I picked the kids up from school this morning. The boys are in one class and Ryley's in another. I really like Ryley's teacher. She's younger, seems fresher, more something. The boys teacher is older, seems tired, like she's lost her love of the job or something or it's just her personality.

Anyways, our very first meeting wasn't the best first impression for me, as far as her having my id boys in her class. She made the comment on the fact that she'll never know who is who. Nice. That doesn't sit well with me when someone automatically decides they don't want to get to know each of my boys. Family or otherwise.

School starts and things seem to be going okay. That teacher was gone for about a week for her dd's wedding. So we had subs. Anyways, she comes back this week. Beginning of the week, Dylan tells me that this teacher still doesn't know their names. Meaning she calls them the wrong name, apparently. This was out of the blue, when asking how their day was, so I didn't ask for this info or even think about it by now. It's been about a month. She sees them every morning for 3 hours a day. Another indication that she's not taking the time to know my boys in her class.

Today, as she is opening the door to let them out, instead of saying anything pleasant she says to me, in that tone, talking to the child - but saying it to me, but so the child can hear type of thing - that it would be great if I could talk to the boys about looking at her when she calls their names. Nice, I'm no expert, but I know enough about child development, etc, to know that you don't do that in front of a child. It's not nice. It doesn't make the child feel good. And I personally don't think it's professional for her to do that. Write me a note. Send me an email. Express your concerns about my children away from my children.

This is a preschool where there are typicals and kids that need extra help. So patience should be a virtue for this type of preschool teacher. So to single my boys out like this, bothers me.

So the boys don't look all that proud when they come to me. I ask them about their day, etc. Keeping it light. Ask them if they had some trouble listening to Miss. Donna today. Ayden was near tears and voice crackling. Dylan did get misty telling me that she wasn't nice to him today. I asked him what happened, but he didn't have an answer for that. So whether she was nice to him or not, I don't know. I talked to them about keeping their listening ears on and that they need to look at the teacher when she calls their name.

I've stewed about this since I picked them up an hour ago.

Let this go and keep an eye on the situation? Send her a note to say I would love to further communicate about the boys through email or phone calls?

Next year they will be in the afternoon class and I think I will request that they stay together and hopefully will get Ryley's teacher.

I feel bad for the boys. They are so sweet and loving and friendly. I hate when I feel like someone isn't being as nice to them as they could be. Especially their first preschool teacher. I think it could be a personality conflict and that she's probably about ready to be done being a preschool teacher.

I blogged this, so sorry if you read my blog and see this twice.

Michelle

Tyler 17 1/2 years!!
Steph 15 1/2 years!!
Ayden, Ryley & Dylan 3 1/2 years!!
http://triplethefunplus2.blogspot.com/

I'd be on the phone asking her what happened today to make them so upset. Kids aren't supposed to cry in preschool! PRESCHOOL IS FUN! What is up with these teachers?

I have been very pleased w/ how our kids' teacher(s) are making an effort to know who is who. Every morning when she gets them out of the car she looks them *in the face* and tries to see who she has. Most of the time she has been right. I don't expect her to be 100% cause I flub it up sometimes! Lately my girls are looking more and more alike.

I'd be pissed too that she isn't making an effort to know them individually. Shoot, I'm pissed for you!

Call her crabby a$$ and ask her what her problem is with your boys and get to the bottom of it.

Jes
B(GG) 8/04 34 wks
G 7/00

I would call. Or email. But I would definitely follow up on it.

The kids have identical twins in their class this year, and I swear to God I'm not kidding when I say the mother put name tags on them. Really nice cute name tags and they wear them to every class and now not only does the teacher know who each one is, the kids have learned to read their names.

Just a thought. I would have never thought of doing it.

Michele
Sarah, Gregory, Amanda
born 1/22/04 at 35w1d

Our surprise baby Austin born 06/15/2005

www.fourtimesthefun.blogspot.com

Ditto to that. I would in no way 'let it go'! Trust your instincts on this one; you sound like you have a pretty good handle on this teacher's personality (or lack of it) already. If all else fails, pay their classroom a visit. Most preschools are more than happy to have parent involvement; they just like advance notice. Of course I'm sure she'd put her happy face on for a parent visit but maybe not. You might get a better read on how she is handling this class.

You need to be your boys' advocate on this one. This is their first school experience; they are not expected to be able to suck it up, just to have fun and come home smiling.

Good luck!

Ellyn, the three little Z's(bbb 4/12/02), two littler S's(gb 7/22/04)
and seven other siblings(yes, that's 12!!)

http://lilypie.com>

http://lilypie.com>[/i

We did the name tags the whole first week. After that week, I asked if I needed to continue with the name tags. The boys dress coordinated, so if she even associates their color with then, she has a good chance of getting them right - if she wanted to. That's the key.

I may send then in name tags again so that they don't have to tell their teacher who they are.

Other staff there, think the boys are sooo cute, etc. One even told me that it was easy to tell them apart from the first day, by their personalities! So another key that head teacher doesn't want to take the time.

I will be emailing and asking about how this week has gone, any concerns she has, etc. I'll try to be nice, but I'm blunt at times...
shocker, I know.


Michelle

Tyler 17 1/2 years!!
Steph 15 1/2 years!!
Ayden, Ryley & Dylan 3 1/2 years!!
http://triplethefunplus2.blogspot.com/

I think blunt is okay in this situation. But I tend to be a tiny bit blunt too

Jes
B(GG) 8/04 34 wks
G 7/00

I don't think I'd wait. Kids often hide stuff, so they may have already been unhappy for weeks and it's just been building. And while yes, it would be nice if they followed instructions like looking at the , they're just 3 and that's part of what they learn in preschool! Any chance you can talk to the director and tell that Ryley absolutely loves preschool and the boys are unhappy. Can they switch and be with her? Blame it on a triplet thing if you have to.

What a shame that what should be a fun experience for them isn't turning out that way.

Mary

born 12/12/04 33w2d

I think blunt is fine. They probably aren't looking at her because she's calling them the wrong name. I think putting the name tags back on will make a point TO HER. Like, HEY lady, get with the program here!

Michele
Sarah, Gregory, Amanda
born 1/22/04 at 35w1d

Our surprise baby Austin born 06/15/2005

www.fourtimesthefun.blogspot.com

I would NOT let it go. This is your kids' first experience with school and it SO VITAL that it be a positive one. I would definitely be asking for a conference with her. I would try and kindly express exactly what you have here:

- you are concerned that she has not made the effort to figure out which child is which (and I would word it just like that "she has not made the effort"). Comment that you had expected that after seeing them daily for a month she would be able to tell them apart - does she need you to help her note the distinguishing characteristics? Or do you need to go back to sending them in nametags?

- that you were unhappy about the fact that she was expressing concerns about your children in front of them and that you would appreciate that type of information being conveyed privately.

- that although your children don't have anything negative to say about school, they aren't their normal happy selves when you pick them up.

I might comment "if you are not comfortable having identical boys in your classroom, or if you feel that your personalities and theirs aren't a great fit, I think we need to consider moving them into the room with Ryley". That lets her know you are ready to go to the director with this if she doesn't shape up.

My kids' teacher closes every email to parents (which come several times a week) with "Learning Is Fun!". Yes, it's cheesy and vaguely annoying, but that should be every preschool teacher's attitude. I pop in unannounced A LOT and often just stand outside the classroom and listen. And it is very obvious that "Learning Is Fun" is totally her motto and she lives it out every moment they are in that classroom. With every visit, I am happier with their preschool class. I say this not to rub it in your face, but to encourage you to go with your gut. You SHOULD feel the same way that I do. If you don't, that's your mommy instinct telling you that something isn't a good fit. You need to listen to that instinct and address the situation.

If you aren't comfortable talking to her directly, draft an email asking for a conference to talk about the following and actually list out each of these things. That way you have a chance to write and rewrite until it sounds right and won't offend her or put her on the defensive, but is open, honest, and addresses all the issues.

If you can't fix the situation, you need to talk to the director about your concerns.

BGG born 4/25/05 at 31w1d




New baby girl born 9/19/06

>The kids have identical twins in their class this year, and I
>swear to God I'm not kidding when I say the mother put name
>tags on them.

HEY! Don't laugh - I do that too! Mine aren't cute - just mailing labels. I printed a whole sheet and I just stick a new one on their back when we go places that someone will need to know their name but won't know who is who.

BGG born 4/25/05 at 31w1d




New baby girl born 9/19/06

>I don't think I'd wait. Kids often hide stuff, so they may
>have already been unhappy for weeks and it's just been
>building. And while yes, it would be nice if they followed
>instructions like looking at the , they're just 3 and that's
>part of what they learn in preschool! Any chance you can talk
>to the director and tell that Ryley absolutely loves preschool
>and the boys are unhappy. Can they switch and be with her?
>Blame it on a triplet thing if you have to.
>


I think that's a GREAT suggestion. If she says no, the classes are already set blah blah blah, then you need to go into the problems. The director NEEDS to know that her teacher is not doing a fantastic job.

BGG born 4/25/05 at 31w1d




New baby girl born 9/19/06