first of all, i don't know if i'm in the right place...i apologize if i am. i just don't know where else to go.

i have 2.5 y/o triplets and was about to give birth to a singleton baby girl this past weekend. on saturday, one day before her due date, i went to the ER with decreased fetal movement, and she had passed away. the next day i delivered her by c-section on her due date.

i am in shock. this wasn't supposed to happen with ONE BABY. i delivered healthy triplets for god's sake (i'm so sorry i don't mean to say it like that)...............with all the high risk, it was there, in my mind with the triplets.........all the risk. i am just so caught off guard. everything was going so well and to lose her at 40 weeks???????????

i just don't know how to even begin dealing with this as life goes on......here i am at home, not pregnant, with no baby, recovering from a c-sec. it's just too much.


Joy- mama to
boy, 3lbs 15oz
girl, 4lbs
girl, 4lbs 1oz
at 32+ weeks on Jan 22, 2005

oh Joy,

I am so very, very sorry for your loss. I've known people that this has happened to and I cannot imagine - even with my loss I cannot imagine what you are feeling right now.

I wish there were words but there aren't any. One thing I do know is that there is little anyone can say or do right now to comfort. I simply offer my thoughts and prayers to you and to your family.

My heart aches for you.

Marie

Edited to add, you are absolutely in the right place. I just wish you didn't need to be here.

Joy,

Your post caught my eye and then made me tear up when I read it. How lame it must feel for me to say how sorry I am, but I just wanted to pass along my deepest sympathy and prayers that you can get through this one day at a time.

I have not had to endure your pain, but have had two friends in similar situations...one lost a baby at 22 weeks, the other at term. All I offer in terms of reassurance is that they have kept those babies close in their hearts (one still includes hers as a little angel insignia on all her family cards, etc). It is very sweet and touching and serves to honor that little one's memory.

Hold tight to those three precious toddlers of yours....they will get you through this.

Hugs,

Ellyn, the three little Z's(bbb 4/12/02), two littler S's(gb 7/22/04)
and seven other siblings(yes, that's 12!!)

http://lilypie.com>

http://lilypie.com>[/i

I am so sorry for your loss. To be that far along and that happen. It dosen't matter if you lost a singleton or more it is still a loss and it still hurts. I lost Hayden who is a triplet 4 months ago. It was hard they were born so tiny and sick. So when I got to bring them home i was for sure i would never lose one of them. Then it happend and my whole life turned upside down. I don't know what else to say even knows i am a mom of an angel. Everyone deals with it so different. I do write Hayden's name on the cards I have given to my dad and husband. I am not sure what I am going to do about holidays but I got a feeling his name is going to be on the cards also.
Vent all you have to on this board that is what we are here for. Or I am sure any of us would talk to you through email or however you are comfortable with.
So sorry about your little girl.
Jaclyn

Jaclyn

http://thesheridangang.blogspot.com/

Joy --
I'm so sorry for your loss of your daughter.

I understand your feelings of loss and being lost, coming home empty armed yet having all the pain of pregnancy and childbirth to still deal with.

There are no words that will explain or satisfy or ease pain -- words are just too empty sometimes.

This is the right place to post. You could also contact the national SHARE office. They have a great posting support website and great resources. I have their parent packet in Word form. If you email me, I will send it to you via email.

The world has handed you an enormous heartache. Please don't feel the need to apologize or question whether you "belong" -- right now you "belong" anywhere you want to be and anywhere you can gain support and understanding.

Be gentle with yourself.

Steff

^West Rogers^, ^Keaton Edward^, ^Rebecca Joy^ 1/6/04



Missing their sister ^Maria Jose^ 4/7/04-5/10/04

JOY,

Yes you are comletely in the right place. The women here are wonderful. I am sorry for the loss of your precious daughter. I do not know when it gets better. In all honesty it will probably get worse before it gets better. I have some links to good websites for bereaved parents on my website if you would like to look. They are on the left hand side. www.tripletbutterflywings.blogspot.com

Much love,
Rachel

Rachel - mother of four...forever
^Jaxon^ (3/2/07-5/29/07)
^Courtney^ (3/2/07-3/8/07)
^Colin^ (3/2/07-3/8/07)
23 weeks 6 days
www.tripletbutterflywings.blogspot.com
www.themcconathys.blogspot.com
Kenzington Rae 12/26/08
Born at 36 weeks after 5 months of

I'm so sorry for your loss. Im pregnant right now and people are saying this one should be different due to just being one. Life is so hard and unpredicatable. What can we do? Nothing but hold on to hope. Even that is difficult, sometimes. My heart goes out to you and your family. God bless.

Raquel
Mom to triplet angels: Sophia, Steven Jr. & Xavier b/d 25w4d (11/26/06, & Sweet baby Joseph (11/14/07-11/14/07)
Eliana Grace-God has answered
Born 4/03/09

Joy:

My heart breaks for you. I have no other words, except that you truly belong here. I pray that you will be comforted during this very difficult time.

Cat w/3 Kittens
Caidan, Carina and Caeleigh
Born at 31 weeks, 1/8/04.
It is better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all. In memory of Carina, who was greatly loved.

http://b3.lilypie.com/bDA

Joy

I am so very sorry for what happened to your baby girl. Please know that you are not alone. Something similar happened to me as well. Less than a year before I gave birth to my triplets I was pregnant with a singleton - a perfectly healthy baby I was told. I went into labor 5 days after my due date. I went to the hospital early b/c I hadn't been feeling her move and I was told that she had passed away. Less than 3 months later, I was pregnant with the triplets and delivered them w/out issue - an extremely high risk pregnancy. Doesn't make sense - I've stopped trying to figure it out.

I won't say that it gets easier - your emotions will change with time. Take one day at a time. Just remember her and give your triplets a special hug and kiss.

Sarah

Spontaneous identical triplets born April 2007 at 35 weeks, 6 days:
Baby A - 5 lbs, 3 oz
Baby B - 4 lbs, 13 oz
Baby C - 4 lbs, 13 oz

Sarah's blog: http://thegreatumbrellaheist.blogspot.com/

Rich's blog: http://runningwithtriplets.blogspot.com/

My heart goes out to you and I hope you find some comfort here.

Our little angel
^Alex Joseph^ (11-4/11-5)
Brennan Matthew
Christian Jacob

"
Big brother Justin 8

My heart aches for you. I pray for comfort and peace as I cannot even begin to fathom what you must be going through. Mere words are of no comfort.

Carrie
and the crew...
Tyler 9/01 (9)
and Noah 10/03(7)
Andrew, Jason, and Tessa (5) 11/05