Any suggestions for a new 'controversial' - for a twisted reason, topic ??

Tulip
I'm not going to comment on age, but I would like to support you in expressing your opinions, and in such a way not to offend anyone who really understood what you were saying. I know what it is like to be blasted for having an opinion }>. I received some very hostile comments from people a while back, who didn't even really read what my original post was about. My words were misconstrued and some people were really nasty. My words were not even directed at anyone in particular, I just wanted to propose something to think about before practicing 'hero worship' on some fortunate women who have long healthy pregnancies. Some people even called me a liar for saying my comments weren't aimed towards anyone in particular. What they did not get is that I was talking about people's responses (ie- calling someone a hero or superwoman for going to 35+ weeks) not anyone in particular who experienced a fortunate pregnancy outcome.

I also received some very supportive responses publically and privately. I was told by several people that they were afraid to say they had agreed with me, for fear of being publically ridiculed.
I personally enjoy coming to this site, in hopes of having some info that may help prevent someone from suffering some of the incredible heartache my whole family has suffered. I think you have done just that Tulip for many women, so keep on expressing your opinions ! I have also received some invaluable information from people who understand things in a way that others just can't.

Can you tell it still makes me a little angry ? Even though I hate to admit that }> , it is really silly to let people who just don't get me or value my opinion get to me, but easier said than done sometimes.

Lorraine

Lorraine

Reach for the heart of God and not just His hands.
Organ donation saves lives!
Life happens when love is given.


http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/bradenwild

How about debating the merits of permitting infants/small children to listen to various kinds of music, such as classical, jazz, rap, heavy metal, etc.? My neighbor across the street sees nothing wrong with her children & toddler listening to Eminem. My opinion is quite the opposite, especially since they are not exposed to other kinds of music than rap.

But seriously, Lorraine, I hear you when you say it's frustrating when people get worked up over something said that was never intended to offend, or when people challenge your personal experiences (and I'm not referring to anyone or any recent events, I'm only speaking in a general context). Debating & expressing opinions are one thing, but trying to invalidate someone or silence them is abysmal (again, speaking only in a general context!).

I know you can't please all of the people all of the time, though.

I always look forward to your posts, Lorraine!!! There are several folks here who have so much to share, so much wisdom & guidance from which to benefit. I count you in that grouping.

Tulip & The Three Amigos
Born at 35w5d on December 31, 2002 - Happy New Year's Eve!!!
Aimee, Let's bump heads!
Edward, Rollin' Rollin' Rollin', Got to keep on rollin'!
Hope, Bouncy! Bouncy! Bouncy! WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

YES! You *can* breastfeed triplets!!!
http://www.tripletconnection.org/dcforum/forum1/14349.html

Tulip & The Three Amigos
GBG born at 35w5d on December 31, 2002 - Happy New Year's Eve!!!

YES! You *can* breastfeed triplets!!!

I am a Velveteen Rabbit, and the birth, love, kisses & magic that are my children has made me Real.

"How about debating the merits of permitting infants/small children to listen to various kinds of music, such as classical, jazz, rap, heavy metal, etc.? My neighbor across the street sees nothing wrong with her children & toddler listening to Eminem. My opinion is quite the opposite, especially since they are not exposed to other kinds of music than rap."

Yikes ! that would be scary if that wasn't controversial (only rap music exposure that is) to many more people than just your neighbor Is she friends with or the same neighbor with the nasty dogs and the nasty attitude ?
My kids are music 'nerds' . I only played classical music in the car and at home until they were about 4, with the exception of some good 'kids music'. Now my kids listen mostly to KLOVE (Christain radio station) and some CDs we have. They thought an old CD- that was my grandpa's was cool even !! They are probably going to rebell soon and start listening to Eminem too .

Thanks for your kind words

Lorraine

Lorraine

Reach for the heart of God and not just His hands.
Organ donation saves lives!
Life happens when love is given.


http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/bradenwild

(Last summer I vented about my neighbor & it caused a controversy & I got flamed, let's do it again!)

It's the same neighbor! She's the one with the dogs, the out of control kids, and the stupid skateboard ramp that the county finally discovered & ordered removed. It's her kids who come over into my yard and trample my flowerbeds, leave their toys all over the place (meaning, on our property), play on & in our vehicles, and actually stand in the street and won't move when a car comes (they like to block people from driving into their driveways when coming home from work).

Tonight REALLY ticked me off! See, we're having a big snow & ice storm here in Portland (big for here, not like back East). My neighbor's kids, other neighbor kids, and other kids from whoknowswhere, have been using the street to play in. Fine. I have no problem with that. It's snowing, so have fun!

But now it's night. The nursery faces the street. At 9:00 pm the kids were still out playing in the street. Okay, not my kids, I don't own the street, they're still being noisy, but hey, that's life. I just hoped my babies wouldn't wake up. However, they then started coming into our driveway to play, too, with the noise level coming that much closer to the house. I mean, they're just right up against the house using our driveway to sled in & play, directly under the babies' window. So, I went out there and asked them to not use our driveway. Simple, right? Of course not! They just laughed at me and kept on playing. So I went out there again and asked them again, but they yelled back at me, so I lost it (sorry, I'm tired & this kind of thing pi$$es me off, I'm sick of these kids running the entire neighborhood) and yelled back. Obviously that didn't work.

So now they are having fun coming into the driveway & into our front yard, yelling even louder and calling me names (I don't care about the names, but they were using the f-word and being loud). So I went across the street and asked my neighbor to please have her kids stay off our driveway. She went ballistic on me, told me I needed to be more tolerant, and slammed the door in my face.

So I called the sherrif and asked them if I truly did need to tolerate this kind of activity, and of course the answer was no, I said thank you and ended the call. I was going to leave it at that, BUT by then the kids were being even more obnoxious and horrible in our yard & driveway, and were just totally out of control. So, I called the sherrif back and asked them to please call my neighbor & ask her to keep her kids off my driveway. They said they would. But just a minute later the snow & ice chunks start being hurled at the house, door, windows, etc... So I called back and asked the sherrif to add that I didn't want the kids throwing stuff at the house, either. By that time DH went out there (I asked him to) and, being from NYC, was rather unpleasant in what he said to the kids (we're talking some choice obscenities & a threat to kick some a$$). Inside I was enjoying hearing what he said (Oh, I'm such a bad person!), because it's what I wanted to say. I had a feeling that the threat to kick a$$ would cause trouble, though, and it did.

The kids all ran to their homes & told what DH said, conveniently leaving out the part as to why DH was so upset. My neighbor marched over here, banged on our front door (which is also by the nursery, they share a wall), and started to chew me out for threatening the kids (which I didn't). By that time a dad from down the street marched over here and insisted DH come out so he could kick DH's a$$ for threatening the kids. So then DH had to come out, he did apologize for talking like that to the kids, so luckily no fisticuffs. I explained that I had asked the kids to not play in our driveway, they didn't, I asked them again, they didn't, I yelled, they didn't go, I had asked the neighbor to do something and they still didn't go...

So both neighbors left our front steps and I could hear them in the street asking the kids about throwing stuff at our house. Naturally the kids denied doing it. And now DH is mad at me for involving him.

IS IT ASKING TOO MUCH THAT THESE KIDS SIMPLY *NOT* PLAY IN OUR DRIVEWAY & YARD? IS IT ASKING TOO MUCH THAT THE DOGS NOT COME OVER HERE & CR@P IN THE YARD, OR THREATEN ME ON MY OWN PROPERTY???

I am so sick of these horrible kids running this neighborhood. They break glass & leave it where it falls. Go into everyone's yard like they own it. Are so noisy & foul-mouthed it's appalling. I'm not the only person who is furious about this, but of course I'm the only one who says anything.

Oh, and even though Animal Control was notified about her dogs threatening me in my own driveway, she still lets them run loose.

Oh, and get this! That skateboard ramp was positioned so that when we backed our cars out of our driveway we had to really crank the wheel or we would hit it. It was very wide & protruded out into the street into the driving lanes, it was wider than a semi-truck. So anyways, we've put up with that for several years (but now it's gone). A month ago DH got a mini-truck, a Toyota, I think? Anyways, he parks it in front of our house, and that makes it directly behind our neighbor's driveway, so now she has to be careful when she backs up or she'll hit it. Do you know she had the nerve to tell DH about it and insinuate that he shouldn't park in front of our house???

Tulip & The Three Amigos
Born at 35w5d on December 31, 2002 - Happy New Year's Eve!!!
Aimee, Let's bump heads!
Edward, Rollin' Rollin' Rollin', Got to keep on rollin'!
Hope, Bouncy! Bouncy! Bouncy! WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

YES! You *can* breastfeed triplets!!!
http://www.tripletconnection.org/dcforum/forum1/14349.html

Tulip & The Three Amigos
GBG born at 35w5d on December 31, 2002 - Happy New Year's Eve!!!

YES! You *can* breastfeed triplets!!!

I am a Velveteen Rabbit, and the birth, love, kisses & magic that are my children has made me Real.

tulip- i don't know if you will check back this far int he postings and see this but it thought your venting about your neighbor was good reading- and shame on those kids and their parents. we are also on the west caost- puget sound area so we had the same storm you did and no snow removal equipment anyplace. pretty funny to see the town shut down with two or three inches if snow. but anyway- your nieghbor thing- you should call the police. those kids are trespassing and damaging your property. i would feel threatened by their behavior. plus wasn't it cold and dark at 9 at night. they should be at home not yelling at you. then i think it is time to go house hunting. good luck terri

terri
mom to ian,wes,amelia (09/02)
leslie 12 years
micaela 9 years

DH & I were talking this morning about how we don't like living here anymore, mostly because of these hellion children. Too bad we are on the financial edge, or we would get out of here!

I *am* going to call the sherrif from now on when these kids trespass, screw trying to be nice & ask them to leave - I've been asking them to stay off our driveway & yard for several years! They don't listen, and their mother is a whacko. Did you know she does drugs while the kids are at home? I mean she does them so bad that she is incapacitated. One time she was so sick from doing drugs that for three days she had friends come and take her children away because she couldn't even get up to take care of herself, let alone them (at least she had the ability to farm the kids out, though). She doesn't do drugs all the time (I don't think), but still, that they are in the home with the children is totally unacceptable. And she leaves them all alone frequently, completely unsupervised. Meaning, she gets in the van & drives off to run an errand. This kind of thing just makes me crazy. Her boys disappear & can't be found, and I fear that some day a pervert is going to nab them or their little sister a la Samantha Runion.

While I am in no way trying to slam people who rent homes, it infuriates me that renters can be such bad neighbors that they drive away people who own the homes. Our next-door neighbor had a hard time selling their home this summer because of these wild children. They had several prospective buyers tell their agents they didn't want to purchase a house in a neighborhood with kids like those! Our neighbor had to lower the house price just to sell the house! Isn't that awful???

Tulip & The Three Amigos
Born at 35w5d on December 31, 2002 - Happy New Year's Eve!!!
Aimee, Let's bump heads!
Edward, Rollin' Rollin' Rollin', Got to keep on rollin'!
Hope, Bouncy! Bouncy! Bouncy! WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

YES! You *can* breastfeed triplets!!!
http://www.tripletconnection.org/dcforum/forum1/14349.html

Tulip & The Three Amigos
GBG born at 35w5d on December 31, 2002 - Happy New Year's Eve!!!

YES! You *can* breastfeed triplets!!!

I am a Velveteen Rabbit, and the birth, love, kisses & magic that are my children has made me Real.

Man just reading about your neighbor kids made me mad now I can feel nothing but pity for them. Can you imagine how messed up their life is? No wonder why they are angry little beings, they don't have anyone rasing them right. I still say stay firm with those kids they might actually respect that you treated like children with rules.

Click here to subscribe to a parent's group with triplets born in the summer of 2002: tripletsquads2002-summer-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
*†¯`·.,*† ¸.·´¯`·.¸¸.->*† .¸¸.·*†(¯`·.¸*†¸.·´¯`·.¸¸.->*†
Mom of SuperTwins
I believe in miracles - I have three that live in my home. June 2002 @ 30 wks
http://www.michaelclancy.com/ (picture of a baby holding doctor's hand while still in utero during surgery @ 21 wks)

*†¯`·.,*† ¸.·´¯`·.¸¸.->*† .¸¸.·*†(¯`·.¸*†¸.·´¯`·.¸¸.->*†
I BELIEVE in miracles - g/g/g- June 2002 @ 30 wks and they are 10!
Married to my best friend
Financial Peace is possible www.daveramsey.com
Support for Infertility www.pregnantwithhope.com

I listen to KLOVE too. I love that station. But I also listen to the popular stations that play the variety.

Taryn, proud mommy to:
Shane-6 (born at 38 wks.):-)
Alyssa,Alyson & Ashley- 3!!!(born at 33.5 wks.):-)
Forget terrible two's, now it's TERRORIZING three's. YIKES!!!!

lorraine and tulip- the controversy police got me too and when i read this thread it made me think that it is not necessarily the post in response to the original question that is controversial- but instead the responses and judgements that follow to create the controversy. does that make sense? and sometimes the controversy makes for interesting reading. how boring if we all thought the same thing and said the same things and never disagreed or debated. we would be clones or drones or something. worry not about controversy. it spices up things sometimes and makes people think about a different viewpoint or style of writting or method of making a point. life is not all sugar, there is some spice too. there is controversy in life- terri

terri
mom to ian,wes,amelia (09/02)
leslie 12 years
micaela 9 years

I don't know what this is about, but the twinsmagazine.com message boards just got over a big fight between a couple of members...must be the post-holiday stress?

Mom of a princess, age six, and two princes, age 4

Terri
"it is not necessarily the post in response to the original question that is controversial- but instead the responses and judgements that follow to create the controversy. does that make sense?"
yes it makes perfect sense.
"sometimes the controversy makes for interesting reading. how boring if we all thought the same thing and said the same things and never disagreed or debated."
I agree again, just though it would be fun to have a new 'controversy'/debate
Maybe something like Target vs Walmart ?
A few friends and I had a very funny/silly discussion about this a few days ago- it's amazing how strongly people feel about 'their' store

I really enjoy a good debate. I always have, it was kind of a family hobby, when growing up . I respect other people with different viewpoints, and always will. It would be VERY boring if everyone thought the same. If I expect others to at least consider what I have to say, then I need to do the same. I know better than to think that 'my way' is the 'only way'. I don't enjoy being attacked though, for expressing my opinion. I'm not perfect though, and sometimes topics just hit a 'hot button' in all of us

Lorraine

Lorraine

Reach for the heart of God and not just His hands.
Organ donation saves lives!
Life happens when love is given.


http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/bradenwild

Its almost impossible not to have controversy at a place where there are so many different personalities, lifestyles, backgrounds, education levels and oppinions!

And it is too bad that the originall post seems to get lost when people start to voice their oppinions, but it happens. When one group or person feels singled out whatever the original intent may have been , feelings are bound to be hurt. And then everyone has an oppinion! But thats the great thing that we can all have an oppinon and we can share it. I only wish people could respect it as just that , a personal oppinion and not get offended! We all have them and some speak out and some hold theirs in.

I think that people lose their manners a bit in this cyber world and tend to think they have the right to point fingers and even may go as far as to slander another person for their oppinion. When if we were all face to face and in an open disscusion say on a proffessional level or even at a social level we would keep our manners at check and be on our best behaviors, atleast I can only hope!

This is America and I just wanted to say again, Thank you to all of you for voicing your oppinions! Its so wonderful to live in this country where we have the right to speak freely amongst each other and not be stoned to death for it! Though I see the stones being thrown here!

Cant we just respect each other as women, as sisters and as mothers!
Afterall we have all been thrown into the same boat when we were blessed with multiples! And we all here to share our advice and oppinions about our experiences! And recieve advice as well! We tend to agree and disagree , it makes the world go around ! And makes for much less boring reading too! Though I may not agree with someones oppinion I will respect it! And maybe I dont agree with somones advice , I just wont use it ! Its very hard not be oppinionated here at TC but we can still try to be polite and kind towards each other

It just seems to get real "Highschool" here sometimes and thats a big turn off! Just my oppinion though

Kim

Kim
Wife to Brian
Mommy to BBG @ 32.5 wks)

Tulip, how about having a water hose ready and when those crappy kids come onto your property turn it on them. They'll get tired of getting wet........ I guess I'm joking but Oh wouldn't it feel good? (Especially if it is 30 degrees outside).

As for controversy, we have as many opinions as we have members, it's bound to happen, after all the ONLY thing most of us have in common is that we have multiples.

AnneLena - SAHM
^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^
Christian 17
Savannah 12
Jacob 3
and surviving sextuplets born at 32.2 wks Dec 02:
Noah 4# 4oz
Dylan 4# 3oz
Amalie 4# 2oz
^angel d^
^angel e^
^angel f^
^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^

AnneLena - SAHM
·.¸><((((º>.·´¯'..¸.·´¯'..¸><((((º>.·´¯'..¸.·´¯'..¸><((((º>.·´
Christian 19
Savannah 13
Jacob 4 1/2
and surviving sextuplets born at 32.2 wks Dec 02:
Noah 4# 4oz
Dylan 4# 3oz
Amalie 4# 2oz
Sweet Angels ^d^ ^e^ ^f^ We'll love you f