I promise I won't document every psych visit for you, but I just have to share that yesterdays appt was HARD. We switched the appt from today to yesterday since I couldnt drive and DH went back to work today. This whole past weekend was hard because on Friday it had been 4 weeks since the girls were born and then yesterday was the 6th, which I guess symbolizes the day of each month I will probably be accustomed to remembering for the rest of my life. So needless to say, going into the appt I was a mess again. She did tell me that having thoughts of concieving again was normal and that its actually a good thing since that is a thought "outside" of grief. I thought I was thinking those things to replace the girls, since I wanted babies to be here so bad, and there should be babies in this house, but then DH said "there is nothing to replace because they are here with us", and that just had me sobbing uncontrollably. *sigh* He thinks so positively, and then theres me: "but they are not here, I am not changing them, feeding them, kissing them or playing with them", I should probably take a lesson from him. Today I managed to drive two blocks away to the video store to return a movie, yay. It felt really weird but I guess thats progression. It actually feels a little less stressful being alone at home right now and I can do things at my own pace. xoxo Nan

Nan~
In loving memory of my beautiful girls:
^Shelby Lee^, ^Megan Aimee^ and ^Lynne Barbara^,
March 6, 2009, born at 20 weeks, 0 days.
http://rememberingourtripletangels.blogspot.com/
http://forumforgrievingdads.com/