I am totally cheating, I am copying my "other" blog post I just wrote, my fingers hurt! Hugs everyone Nan

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We finally made it to transfer, hallelujah! I am grateful that I had two embies that were pretty much saying "pick me, pick me", as they were the last two good ones out of four. That, was close, much too close to an early failure for my head to handle! But, I am better now that I am on a two week wait now. I do hope the prayers helped us get to this point and beyond, thank you for them For now, I am happy to be resting with two embies hopefully thriving.

I need to vent a little on this post, and I don't feel it's right, but this is what this new blog is about, right? Getting all of my thoughts and feelings out? Well, most of them, anyhow. So here goes.

Yesterday, I was on pins and needles waiting for my status report from my IVF nurse, she usually calls me no later than 2PM. 3 o'clock rolls around and nothing, so I call the office...here is the conversation (please tell me if I am wrong here):

Nan: Hi, Im sorry to bother you but I usually hear from you by now and was wondering whats up?
IVF Nurse: What do you mean?
Nan: How my embies are doing??
IVF: Didnt you have your transfer today?
Nan: Um, Nooooooooo.
IVF: Oh, OH, (shouts in the background "did I get an embryo report today") Oh, yeah how bout that, I did.
Nan: OK, cause Ive kinda been on the edge of my seat waiting to see how they are doing, Im shaking for real.
IVF: Oh, they are fine, but one did arrest, you have four embies with 4 cells on each.
Nan: Ok, so does that mean I am scheduled for tomorrow?
IVF: Yes, you are scheduled at 7am, full bladder needed.
Nan: Ok, we talked about an HCG booster or taking Estrace, did the doc decide which one he wants to do?
IVF: Didn't I put that on your discharge papers?
Nan: No (looking at my papers it read "will call about estrace"), I dont have that on my papers.
IVF: Ok, this is how you take it, (etc etc), and this is when you take it, (etc etc.) - Goodluck.

Is it just me? Or would you be appalled at the way this conversation went? This person leaves her office at 3:30 so I would have missed her had I waited much longer to call her. I dont know what is up with this office lately, but the only people there I can tolerate are the doctors anymore. I felt like my jaw was dropped the entire conversation, and Im thinking thankfully I have been thru this before or I would have not known what to ask! What about the first time IVF'ers out there, is she doing this to them? She was totally in the clouds, definitely not on earth. I am over it, but it ticked me off as I didn't need the added stress, WTF! Thats what babylost Moms want - more stress - screw you!!!!!!!!!

Ok, breathing again now. I am one of those people that cannot eat when they are stressed, but when the stress is over for a bit, I chow down....so finally today I ate, but then I ate again, and I cannot stop eating, like I haven't eaten in days. Must have been a large weight to come off the shoulders for me to chow down like that! YAY.

Transfer this morning, went really well. I met another one of Dr. F's partners who did the procedure, his name is Dr. G, and he was so sweet. He walked in in scrubs and a cup of McDonalds coffee, and introduced himself. I asked him if we are definitely doing assisted hatching cause thats what worked before. That then triggered the question from him, 'oh you have children from IVF?', without realising what I was going to say, I just said 'we had a loss'. He was sorry and so sincere, so I got a little teary. He explained that the embies he wanted to transfer could not be better, and I was so happy to hear that. Out of the other two, one did not get past 4 cells and one was a 9 cell, but a low grade cell so it wasnt what he wanted to use, he would watch those to see if freezing happened, but its a long shot. I am praying this works. The cells we transferred were 8 cell grade A, which is what our triplet girls were. So I think we have a good shot at this. Now if it happens, can we hold on. I will focus on it working first. Two week wait here we come.

Love, Nan xoxoxo

Nan~
In loving memory of my beautiful girls:
^Shelby Lee^, ^Megan Aimee^ and ^Lynne Barbara^,
March 6, 2009, born at 20 weeks, 0 days.
http://rememberingourtripletangels.blogspot.com/
http://forumforgrievingdads.com/