Hi,

It looks like we are a rare breed! I'm sorry you get little help from your ex. With me, we separated a couple weeks after the kids turned 3. I was completely shocked and wasn't expecting it. But, I have to say, even though my ex wasn't a good husband, he is a good father. From the beginning he continued to help me, coming over almost every night to get me through dinner, baths and bed. It was tough being around him during that time. I was sooo angry with him, but I also was sooo overwhelmed that I needed the help. I also didn't want to let him off the hook by leaving me all the work. Sometimes I would go to the grocery or run errands while he took care of the kids at my house. Now, things are pretty good. He keeps them overnight a couple nights a week and comes over on Thursday nights to help finish homework, etc. We are able to be in the same room together without killing each other, so that's a blessing. I have no family in town, but he has tons. They ALL are angry at him and have supported me from the beginning. In fact, I get invited to the holiday celebrations and he doesn't. It's a little strange.

But, that all being said, it is still very tough. The nights that I am on my own are exhausting. There simply isn't enough time in the day to do all the things we need to do. Forget about playing together. It's just trying to do what we HAVE to to make it to tomorrow. I hate that I have to be in this situation and would just like to be a normal family. My exhaustion leads to me getting angry when I shouldn't and things like that. I want to be a fun happy mom, but when you are doing it on your own, it's hard to deal with it all and enjoy it too. Sometimes you are just trying to survive.

Anyway, glad we could connect. I hope to hear from a few more moms like us!

Tracy
Mommy to Lindsey, Patrick and Brooke
Born 1-14-03 at 32weeks, 3 days and ^i^ twins Dylan 1-12-02 and Cole 1-21-02