Can I jump in here? Camille, it sounds like you're relationship is a lot like mine was. My husband "checked out" in March 08. The triplets were just over 2, and my son was 3. He finally moved out this past March 09 after months of me begging him to go to counseling, make it better, etc. He is very passive-aggressive and narcissistic (my therapists words), which has made it very hard to move forward. It's been getting better every day/week/month. Plus I've had 15 months to prepare for this. It does get better in a lot of ways, but be prepared for the mental abuse to escalate. He will come at you full force when you make the move to get out from the dysfunctional relationship....at least that's what my husband did. Tried to guilt me into believing it's all my fault, etc. Which it's not, it takes two to tango, and I could make your head spin with the tales of everything he's done in this relationship over our 10 years of marriage.

As for being the sole caretaker for the kids, the hardest part is working full time at my "job" during the day, then working full time in the evening at my "second job" as mommy to the kids. Not to mention my role as mommy, daddy, housekeeper, lawn technician, household repair-woman, chef, etc etc. It's daunting, but I take it one day at a time. My ex does come over every Wed evening to see the kids, but he doesn't get here until 6pm, then leaves when they go to bed at 7:30pm. Then he does the every other weekend thing too. I miss my kids terribly, but I get so much done on those weekends. As for dating, I've just been reconnecting with old girlfriends and spending time with them out and about. I've met a few men, and one in particular is incredibly sweet, but knows I'm not looking for a relationship at this point. So it works for now.

I would love to stay connected with you ladies who are divorced, especially those of you who have come out on the other side already! Thanks for your stories and info.

Melissa
ggg 12/05
b 7/04