I have GGGs who turned two this summer. They were born @ 32w4d. Baby A spent 4 weeks in the NICU, Baby B 7 weeks, Baby C 9 weeks. We visited every day for most of the day (like 12 hours). My husband works at the hospital that we delivered at so he would go to work and I would go with him and spend the day with the girls. They kept my girls all in one big room and there was a bed for me most of the time (at least a rocking chair). The routine would be for me to change and take baby A's temp then either feed or kangaroo her. The next feeding I would feed B, then the next feeding I would feed C. I would usually spend about two hours with each baby individually and then time pumping throughout the day. I would take short breaks from the NICU to get lunch or coffee which really helped me stay sane. It was summer time so sometimes I'd just go for a walk around the hospital or find somewhere to sit in the sun for a few minutes. It's easy to get caught up in all the monitors and not leave to take care of yourself but you'll be a better parent when you get back after a break.

We allowed a few visitors, but only when we were there and only if the girls were okay. There were times we sent people away. Visitors (even grandparents) were not allowed to touch the babies until they were discharged. That was our rule since we got so little touch time at first and the girls were pretty fragile that we just make it a rule. They didn't like it but they got plenty of time to hold them once they came home.

Our staff was great (we're in Washington) but there are some that are better than others. We got to know them pretty well since I spent so much time there. They provided blankets for the incubators, made cute signs and name tags for their beds, and took pictures occasionally for us. We had one we didn't like and we let other nurses know that she would not be working with our girls again and they complied. We had one disagreement with the nurses and I finally had to play the mommy card (I'm the mom and you're going to do it my way.). They didn't like that but they did as we wished. I would say that you have a ton of power, you just don't know it yet. Try to keep everyone on the same team, but be an advocate for your children and speak up if something isn't working for you. If you can, go to the staffing meetings (rounds) while they discuss your babies. It helps to have an idea of what to expect.

The main thing to remember is to just take things a day at a time (or an hour or minutes sometimes!). It will seem like an eternity but eventually you'll get home. Be prepared for setbacks and stagnant times. Have people bring you meals and food. Don't be afraid to step on toes and hurt feelings. You don't have time to worry about other people's feelings when you're in the NICU. They'll forgive you. We never spent the night in the NICU. Go home and get good rest and then go back to your babies. It was wonderful to sleep while they were there. The hardest part for me was when one was home (and then two home) and still going back to the NICU for the other(s). The nurses don't really help once the baby has been discharged so you'll have that baby to care for while you're still trying to help the baby that's still inpatient. That was really rough for me.

Good luck. Lots of rambling thoughts!


Brenda