My neice is my gestational surrogate and I'm feeling a little helpless. She's 20 weeks and I'm trying to think of things I can do or get for her to help her through this. Fortunately, she's been doing well, but I'd like to do something to help and feel useful. Any ideas?

Thanks,

Clare
bgb 2/9/04 (26w 4d)

Is she on bedrest? Get her books, movies, anything to do with her hobbies that she can do in bed. A laptop so she can go online and join us. A foot massage kit-lotions, etc. Perhaps an at home mainicure/pedicure or hairstylist? My Mom was going to have her hair dresser come to my house and cut my hair but I was growing it out at the time! Hire a housekeeper to help her keep up the house, prepare meals for her that can just be microwaved and eaten in bed. A pretty pair of pajamas and /or maternity clothes to wear to the DRs visits. A treat like an ice cream shake or whatever indulgence she loves. (I would beg for choclate milk shakes from Baskin-Robbins and cherry limeades from Sonic!) I also wanted crab cakes and reuban sandwiches. hee hee Hope this helps.

Korrie~
^i^B/G/G 24 w 3d,1/17/00
B 10/31/01
B 1/27/03

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I would have died for a pedicure and a massage!!!

My laptop made all the difference in the world to me.

Hey, I know....... a gift certificate for a tummy tuck...... just kidding

I wish you all well, what an incredible thing she is doing for you.

AnneLena - SAHM
^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^
Christian 17
Savannah 12
Jacob 3
and surviving sextuplets born at 32.2 wks Dec 02:
Noah 4# 4oz
Dylan 4# 3oz
Amalie 4# 2oz
^angel d^
^angel e^
^angel f^
^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^

AnneLena - SAHM
·.¸><((((º>.·´¯'..¸.·´¯'..¸><((((º>.·´¯'..¸.·´¯'..¸><((((º>.·´
Christian 19
Savannah 13
Jacob 4 1/2
and surviving sextuplets born at 32.2 wks Dec 02:
Noah 4# 4oz
Dylan 4# 3oz
Amalie 4# 2oz
Sweet Angels ^d^ ^e^ ^f^ We'll love you f

Thanks so much for the ideas -- Right now she's not on bed rest and doing amazingly well. These are great ideas--some for now, some for later. I really appreciate them and I know she will too.

Thanks again,

Clare.

Clare
bgb 2/9/04 (26w 4d)

Treat her to a massage! Make sure the person you select for her has special pregnancy pillows--they make all the difference!

Naomi

Naomi
gbb 7-12-02

how about a trip to the spa for a pregnancy massage?

the laptop is another great idea.

magazines, renting good movies, (if she is on bedrest, why not watch FRIENDS, seasons 1-9 on video??)

you say she is doing well, and since she is just one week ahead of me i am trying to think what i would like. a haircut. a change so i can focus on something new besides my growing tummy. while she can still get up and around, how about a good movie? i saw LOVE ACTUALLY and thought it was cute. MYSTIC RIVER was also great....how about a lunch?

swimming is another great thing to do, makes you feel all lightweight.

you sound a lot like your niece...very thoughtful and caring. glad all is going well. xoxo tess

tess
mummy to 7yr old ds & the triumverate born 2004

Great Ideas, Thanks! She's all set-up with the laptop which I think she'll make good use of. I like the FRIENDS idea - That's perfect for her. THANKS!.

I'll need to check and see if she'd let someone give her a message - I think that would be good too!

We've done some shopping together. That was a lot of fun and she made it so easy for me too. She's very considerate of how I might feel and goes out of her way to make this my event. I'm sooo lucky!

Tess, are you on the east coast? We're in central NJ & PA.
If you'd like email me directly cmyers826@comcast.net

It would be nice to hear all about your experiences and what you're going through, being just a week behind...


Thanks again,

Clare
bgb 2/9/04 (26w 4d)

feed her- she needs to eat lots and lots of healthy tastey food. variety is important. cook for her or have outback steaks delivered. think high protein, etc... and lots of it. terri
ps feed her and you feed your babies

terri
mom to ian,wes,amelia (09/02)
leslie 12 years
micaela 9 years

If she doens't mind the company have a girl's night in. Invite friends and family over, bring pillows, wear jammies and just hang out in her room. Bring lots on goodies and maybe some chick flicks or games. Sometimes, laying in bed that long can be lonely, not just boring.

Kim

Kim
Nate, Nick & Noel(36w4d)and Nia.

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Ohh, maybe a journal for her to keep while in bed, something you can keep for the babies after they're born. That could be special for both of you.

Kim

Kim
Nate, Nick & Noel(36w4d)and Nia.

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Yeah!!!

Wait for another 7 or 8 weeks and then start planning something special together. First, I suggest "wait" because I remember some fairly smooth sailing until about week 23 or so. Second, it gets much tougher.

One really nice thing to plan would be a nice Carribbean Cruise, or a trip somewhere with another good friend. (You are going to have your hands full, elsewhere!!)

But you could buy scrapbooks and pick up a bunch of magazines and scissors and paste and then map out a "dream vacation" daydreaming all of the places you would stop and see, etc. Check to see what things would be playing while you were there, etc. Turn it into a real project, just as though you were on a trip together. After you've completed it, find a good travel agent to help you find a trip that includes as much of the "dream vacation" as possible to mirroring it.

By doing it in that order, you will have engaged her mind in imagining the trip during the most miserable part of the pregnancy, and she'll have a beautiful "memory book" before she leaves on the cruise, filled with memories of the two of you working on the book together while she was finishing up the pregnancy!

Cat w/3 Kittens
Caidan, Carina and Caeleigh
Born at 31 weeks, 1/8/04.