Beth:

I have heard this a couple of times. It is such a cruel and hurtful statement. I tend to ignore as much as possible and not even "go there" with people who are so insensitive.

Lisa
Mom to Aidan, Christian, and Rachel (10.03.01 @ 36wks)

Lisa
Mom to Aidan, Christian, and Rachel (10.03.01 @ 36wks)

I had someone say to me the other day "I wish I had triplets, it would have been easier." Oh yeah, I wonder what made her think that three at one time would be easier than three at separate times?? I also had one woman say "Boy you have it made, one birthday party, one back to school night and potty train all at one time." Who is she kidding???

I actually think your comeback was pretty good. Sometimes I get so taken back that I can't even come up with something even slightly clever. However, I always let everyone know how blessed I am to have my gang.

Diane
mom to
Nicole 5
Shane, Owen and Skylar 3/22/03

Diane
mom to
g 8/98
bbg 3/03

Yeah, the comment we heard was "I would slit my wrist". It is amazing what people will say about these little blessings from God. Mine will be nine in a few months and I count it a true privelage (sp?) to be their mother.

Tammy
Proud mom of
12 year old identical GGG

I think your response was perfect! Why stoop to their level. HOWEVER, I do have one very harsh response that I save for when I'm in a REALLY bad mood. I've only used it once, and probably can't use it anymore now that the babies are getting older and understanding more of what I say! Anyway, when a really rude woman said that to me, I said "well, I'd probably kill myself if I had YOUR life, but the difference is, I wouldn't be rude enough to say so." If you're ever feeling nasty, use that one--it'll stun them into silence!

Melinda
mom of Annabelle, Lillian and Charlotte, 2/25/03
35 weeks, 6 days

Beth,

I am sorry you had to experience this sh**, and that is exactly what it is in my opinion. I am sorry but it is so crude to say that to someone. She probably thinks she is so funny but she doesn't understand that what she says affects others in many ways.

Did Dylan hear her comment? Did he react? I usually ignore most of the obnoxious comments and I have to say overall, the positive comments totally outweigh all of the stupid ones for us ~ thank God!

In the past I also heard the "OMG TRIPLETS...AND THESE THREE TOO??? "OMG I'd put a gun to my head and shoot myself, better you than me..." OK, in my opinion, this woman totally crossed the line of decency when this happened to me! I had all my kids with me; it was at The Children's Place at the mall.

So how did I handle it? Like you, initially, I was just shocked that ANYONE could say such a mean, hateful, stupid thing! I was going to ignore her until... Trevor, age 6 at the time, asked, "Mom why does that lady think you should kill yourself, because of us? What did we do?" Shannon, age 7 at the time, asked "Who would take care of us if you died Mommy? "We didn't do anything wrong why does that lady think you'd be better off dead than having us?" Sierra, 3 at the time, started crying hysterically, you know the kind of crying where they aren't breathing right and the snot is pouring down their nose, and says, "I don't want my mommy to die just because we have triplets, I love my mom, mommy please don't shoot yourself in the head." Yep, how's that for a nice trip to the flipping mall???

I was SO MAD, you know how you can feel your face getting all red and your body is shaking uncontrollably? I stood right next to that stupid woman, who I KNOW heard everything my kids said, and said "Happy with yourself?" and walked away. AHHHHH ~ that was two years ago and it still pisses me off. I really think I could have taken her head off is she uttered one mopre stupid word.

Again, I am sorry you had to hear that one...

Cindy
Happy & Proud Mommy to:
Shannon Alexis 12
Trevor Jack 10
Sierra Brooke 7
Madison Rose 5
Mackenzie Lynn 5
Max Christopher 5

Well, I wasn't an adult about this comment when a lady said it to me in front of my kids (and DH) at the mall. Before I realized what I had said I blurted out, "too bad you didn't have triplets becasue then you could have killed yourself and the world would have one less inconsiderate as*Ho** to deal with." I glared at her and told her she better watch what she said in the future... She gasped and stood there speechless. When she got off the elevator the other people clapped! I know it wasn't classy or "big of me", but it felt wonderful to say! Maybe she'll think before she speaks in the future.

Denise

Triplefigs
Proud mom to 3.5 year old bbg

"Train up a child in the way he should go; and when he is old, he will not depart from it." Proverbs 22:6

Denise
Proud mom to BBG 2000

Beth, your reply was amazing, you did great. Only one other thing you could have done, complained to the management at the store, they should know how this twit treats customers

I am not shy when it comes to telling people off but I do have "big ears" with me a lot of the time so I have to be creative, but the other day I did sort of loose it and said really loudly "How rude, do you always sound that stupid?"! She had commented "Triplets, how horrible, you poor thing!!!"

AnneLena - SAHM
^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^
Christian 17
Savannah 12
Jacob 3
and surviving sextuplets born at 32.2 wks Dec 02:
Noah 4# 4oz
Dylan 4# 3oz
Amalie 4# 2oz
^angel d^
^angel e^
^angel f^
^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^-.,.-^

AnneLena - SAHM
·.¸><((((º>.·´¯'..¸.·´¯'..¸><((((º>.·´¯'..¸.·´¯'..¸><((((º>.·´
Christian 19
Savannah 13
Jacob 4 1/2
and surviving sextuplets born at 32.2 wks Dec 02:
Noah 4# 4oz
Dylan 4# 3oz
Amalie 4# 2oz
Sweet Angels ^d^ ^e^ ^f^ We'll love you f

I have had this said to me 3 times so far. Once by a stranger when my kiddos were tiny and I responded, "Go ahead anyway, we won't miss your stupid remarks." The person just stood there in shock, while I walked away giggling to myself.

Another time was by a stranger again but in front of other people (at a restaurant) and I said, "What a horrible thing to say about my children! Please don't talk like that in front of them, that was really rude and uncalled for!" Needless to say, they apologized all over themselves. I was really pissed but glad I took the high road. They even had a few of thier own kids with them, around 7ish and 10ish who were acting like total crazed lunatics and my triplets were sitting in their highchairs being the wonderful quiet kids they are! What brought on that comment in the first place?

The third time was by my older sister Laurie's friend that I had just met for the first time. She (the friend) has 5 singletons of her own. When she made the comment, Tim jumped in and said, "Wow, Laurie, you sure know how to pick your friends!" The friend then apologized and said that she didn't mean it, it was the first thing that came to her mind! We are all actually good friends now, I am hand making her wedding invites (for a tiny fortune, I might add!) I know people aren't trying to be rude, but still. I can't wait for the day that people aren't whispering all around us when we go out somewhere. Yesterday at Target, one really loud lady was just going on loudly about "THE TRIPLETS" and how CRAZY it was! On and On, this couple seemed to be everywhere we were. Finally I said really loudly while looking at her, "WE DO HAVE HEARING, YOU KNOW!" It made several customers crack up b/c I am sure they were tired of hearing her loud stupid voice too! Anyway, I am rambling like I do so well, but my point is that I have taken the high and low road on several occasions, but more than anything, I don't want to be known as the B***H triplet mom, but I don't want people to think they can hurt my feelings without getting a response. Good for you for saying something! I too have been mad at myself for not saying what I was really thinking, but then, there are times to stoop down and times to not. I don't want my kids to think it's okay to be mean just b/c someone else did it first, KWIM??



Liana
Proud Mommy to Jack, Alayna, and Emma - 6/12/02 (31 Weeks, 3 days!)

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Liana

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I had a guy walk up to me when the quads were in their stroller and say "Now thats scary" and I said "You must scare easily then". He tried to fumble his way through it but I didn't make it easy for him. Also I've had several people say that about Killing htemselves. It always shocks me. Next time I'll probably say "You don't have much to live for do you?" I think alot of people are just negative people (unfortunately)and as society loses more and more of its manners, they feel no personal responsibility for what they say. But I hope to try and continue to take the high road..but its hard sometimes..LOL.

Michal
B - 11 years old and BGBG quads 7 years old

I've replied (with a stern look), "What a horrible thing to say to a mother about her children!" The older man who made the comment then tried to make it up to me by saying something about how I looked too young to have so many kids (apparently the fact that they were born all at once didn't factor into that comment either, duh). But I'm definitely NOT too young, so he did actually redeem himself somewhat, lol.

Carol

My husband is the primary caregivers to our 4 yr old bbb's and 10 yr old singleton boy. When I read all your responses, he was surprised at all the negatives. He said all he ever hears is lots of praise and positives when he takes the kids out.

So, we are wondering...has anyone else noticed this discrepancy?

TB

I just got a hair cut last Tuesday, and my stylist was telling me about her 4 year old and his great Christmas because he was an oops baby, and she had two much older kids, 19 and 17, and how amazing it was to see Christmas again through the eyes of a child. I said, oh, what a great age I have 3 4 year olds, it was a GREAT Christmas. She said you have 3 4 year olds? I said yes, triplets.

She said, OMG you POOR THING! I can't even imagine! I said, look, you just told me about how much fun you had with ONE on Christmas day and about how wonderful it is, imagine having 3 times that amount of fun! 3 times the amount of wonder! 3 times the amount of amazement! Imagine having 3 times the hugs and kisses! Don't feel sorry for me, they are the best thing that has ever happened to me!

I've gotten the I'd kill myself, I'd shoot myself, I'd slit my wrists, I'd pull my hair out, I'd go insane, etc. I just shake my head and tell them they have no idea what they'd be missing if they did.

MTM - mom to Michael(84),Stephan(85), Thomas, Matthew and Kathryn - born 12/27/99 at 32w 0 days

I get that one alot. The first time I got it though it came from the nutritionist at the WIC office who just went on and on about how she would kill herself. I was so pissed when I left there. From then on out, I always say "Well, what are you waiting for?"

Taryn, proud mommy to:
Shane-6 (born at 38 wks.):-)
Alyssa,Alyson & Ashley- 3!!!(born at 33.5 wks.):-)
Forget terrible two's, now it's TERRORIZING three's. YIKES!!!!

I had this woman say that to me last week on the plane , we were flying to the Dominican Republic for the holidays.. I responded, in my most calming voice, "ok, but please wait till the plane lands, and everyone has gotten off.. what an idiot!

we have traveled via plane with the kids quite a few times, and most of the really stupid comments happen there..

yesterday , on our flight back, I had a complete stranger ask me if I had a c-section with them, she had a little boy with her, I responded I would tell her my birth story if she told me hers first..


Lisa mom to Melanie(23)
Guillermo,Jonathan,William (2 yrs old)

Lisa mom to Melanie(28)
Guillermo,Jonathan,William(10.9.01 @34 weeks)

I get the rude comments all the time too! Just today I was buying 10 pks of diapers and 5 pks of wipes! I was waiting for that one stupid comment, but instead the lady in front of me just gave me a polite smile( I knew it was killing her not to comment, so I made know further eye contact with her) And the cashier was finally very smart not to make any comments too, which totally threw me for a loop! But I was so releived I didnt have to think of a quick come back and make myself out to be the big B word!
Another time my best friend and I were shopping at the mall and I left her at the entrance while I ran out to the van with our bags , so we would have room for more shopping! Well as I walked away some guy said to her " Oh real good freind to leave you with all these kids!" And my babies were all being angels too! She just gave him a dirty look! She was caught off gaurd and didnt know what to say! And she was hurt too because she loves my children like they were her own! And for all this jerk knew , they could have been her kids! Anyways she got her taste of the rude comments people make!

When I was a few mths into my pregnancy bil was talking to dh on the phone and made the most horrible comment Ive ever heard ; He told dh it wasnt to late for him to take a coat hanger to me! ( I didnt even know what it meant ,dh had to explain!) Im still in disbelief when I think of it,he is such an insenstive SOB! And to think that he and dw tried to conceive yrs earlier with no success, she acutally ended up w/ breast cancer and had to quit treatments! But every time I see him I think what a rotten person he is!
Kim

Kim
Wife to Brian
Mommy to BBG @ 32.5 wks)