I don't know what's wrong, I can't get over it, I am so terrified of hiring someone who might hurt the kids or make a mistake or lash out on them... I am on sittercity contacting back and forth, but I FEEL TERRIBLE, I am scared- can anyone relate to this? I am actually going to be losing sleep over this...

and it's not like I'd be leaving them- I'm trying to hire a Mother's helper...

But I can't get over this terrible feeling.

Mom to BBB triplets born on 6/24/09 @ 29 weeks - 2 months in NICU
Baby Boy 9/19/2010

I hired a nanny off Sittercity a few months ago. She watches my girls one day a week for about 11 hours. She is awesome! We had her out for about a 2 hour interview for the first meeting and then I had her 'train' for about 4 hours before I left her alone with my girls. They are two and are verbal so we feel okay that they would tell us if something happened. It was really hard for me to leave the first week. It was really hard to find the right person, but I'll tell you, I'm so glad to be able to work a little bit and have a change of pace in my week (read: a break). I think I can be a better mom when I have a little time away from my girls. I hope that makes sense and that I don't sound horrible.

I hope you find someone and don't lose sleep. You are the boss so you can set the rules in an interview/training period until you feel comfortable. We did a background check on our nanny for extra piece of mind.

Brenda
mom to GGGs born 6/29/09 at 32w4d

Any parent can relate to the fear of trusting someone else with their child. With triplets, that fear is definitely exponential because of all of the additional challenges of having 3 same-aged children.

What eased my concerns was meeting the right person. Trust your gut. Since you'll be hiring a Mother's helper, you can keep a close eye on her interactions with your children, and more importantly, your children's reactions to her. You can take it slow in the beginning and be in the same room until you feel more at ease to step away for short periods.

Try to find someone experienced with handling multiples, or someone with daycare experience where they were used to being outnumbered by young children. We lucked out and found Occupational Therapy students who not only had daycare experience and adore children, but who could help with the kids' therapy goals.

You could do a 2-part interview. If they "pass" the interview with you, let them spend a half-hour or so on the floor with you and the kids, just getting to know them better and watch what happens.

It's a hard transition, but you can do it! When you find the right person, your fears will diminish. Good luck.

Thanks gals. I thought I was being paranoid, glad to knOw others felt this way before- it'll probably take getting used to.

Mom to BBB triplets born on 6/24/09 @ 29 weeks - 2 months in NICU
Baby Boy 9/19/2010

Totally normal. I didn't let a sitter (non family) watch my kids till they were verbal. We had a bad experience and I never would have known if my child could not speak. We might be that one in a million who that occurs to but it took me forever to trust anyone. Now I have to personal know the mom of the sitter we use really well. Trust your gut. Ask someone on your local triplet group for a recommendation if you need a starting point.

I can relate, and I have a mothers helper 2 mornings a week. At first, you are around her all the time, maybe going in and out of the room. You gradually wean yourself away and let her be with the kids as you get comfortable. They are usually within earshot so I can hear playing sounds or talking. After about 6 months I have only left the house 2x while she was here, gone for about 20 min.

One word of advice - spell out what she is supposed to do. I didn't specify too clearly on the cleaning up part, it seemed kinda obvious... LOL - spell it out! I wish I spelled out that yes you are here to play with the kids and change diapers as needed, but if the kids are playing nicely or sitting and eating, you need to tidy up, put the toys they just played with away, wipe up crumbs, whatever. Good luck!

GGB born 12/26/08 @ 34 weeks
4 lb 14 oz
4 lb 12 oz
4 lb 5 oz