Hi!
I have discussed this with a few people close to me. Some get it, others don't.

A little over a year ago, I went back to work after 13 years of being a SAHM. I only work 10 hours per week. I did not go back to work out of financial necessity, although the extra cash is nice. At first, I really enjoyed being out of the house and working. Well, a few things have happened in the last few months that has me re-evaluating my decision to go back. Things that have happened both in my family life and at work.

Home is the usual stresses that come along with having a teenager, 10 yo triplets, one with special needs and just keeping up with daily household stuff. Also, my dfil has been having some major health issues and it is taking its toll. The family is evaluating whether or not he is able to live on his own or if he needs to reside in an assisted living facility. Of course, we will do everything that we can to keep him in his home. That means a lot more involvment from the families that are in close proximity, which I am more than willing to do. In fact, I have a strong desire to do whatever I can for him so that he may remain in his home.

Work. Don't even get me started. To put it simply, I blissfully forgot about the stupid, petty, catty office politics that are present in many work environments. The backstabbing. Personally, I do not have the emotional energy for that sh*t.

In a nutshell, the stress is starting to really pile up. I don't feel as if I am giving my all at both work and home. Of course, my main priority is with my family. Not just immediate, but extended members, like my dfil.

I am really, really, really considering giving my boss my resignation. Yes, it is only 10 hours per week. That isn't taking into consideration travel time, the time it takes to get ready for work or days in which I have to stay late because the office is running behind. 10+ hours per week that takes me away from household/family stuff. 10 hours per week in which I have to put up with petty office politics. 10 hours per week that I could devote to helping out with my dfil.

I have mentioned to dh that I am considering resigning. He thinks I should "tough it out". Although he is a very involved father and dh, I don't think he fully gets it. I don't think he realizes how difficult it is to re-enter the workforce after being a sahm for many years. He doesn't understand the adjustments that I have had to make. He has not had to make a job change in 22 years. He is one of those that doesn't quite "get it". I have a friend that thinks I should stick with it "for the work experience". This is a woman who has never been a sahm and enjoys working outside the home and makes boatloads of money. She has two children and both are over the age of 13yo.

It sounds like a simple decision, but I was brought up in such a way that quitting is the easy way out and I should just "buck up". I almost feel like a failure for wanting to give up, kwim?

Any advice or input?

I don't think resigning would make you a failure at all. Based on what you've written, you are obviously giving this a lot of thought, and not just "throwing in the towel." As you've said, circumstances have changed since you re-entered the workplace, just as they did when you left the workplace to become a SAHM. So, maybe it is time for you to leave for another season. If you don't need the $, and you don't love your job, it seems, (from what you've said) that the best thing for your situation, peace of mind, etc. would be to resign. Tough decision though. Possibly it would be something your husband would appreciate more after the fact. (After he sees your stress level down, and sees that you're able to help out with dfil etc). Good luck deciding.

Amy
Mom to:
G 00
B 01
BBB 02

My advice, do what will make you happy, give you less stress and overall better person for it. The stress created from your job has to affect everyone, even if they don't get it.

It sounds like you have really though this through and when I read it, it did seem that answer was quite clear.

Good luck.

Jane
Anna/Emma/John/^James^ (9/24/03-9/29/03) 26 wkers
In memory of my beloved Emma 9/24/03 - 1/19/07
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