Emma has always picked up on what people say about them more than her sisters.

First it was "Triplets? I'm SO SORRY." She knew what "sorry" meant, but thank goodness she didn't understand that SHE was a triplet. They used to think a "triplet" was some kind of monster.

This past weekend, Emma was with her grandma and great aunt when she out-of-the-blue said "I would KILL myself."

Of course they were surprised and said something to me. I had to explain that it was something people said to us when we're out in public. Isn't that special?!?

It upsets me, and now that someone in school seems to be telling them DAILY that they are triplets - that's a whole other ball of wax - it's only a matter of time before they "get" that people are saying these things in reference to THEM.

I'm kinda venting, but also, how do you deal with this? Do you comment back to people in front of the kids so they understand it's not acceptable? Sometimes people do a "comment driveby" and I can't turn fast enough to see who it was. I guess I feel a little helpless...

Loren
GGG Jan.2005 @ 28wks

Sweetened Taters - http://sweetenedtaters.blogspot.com

That's always been a worry of mine (along with having to explain to my kids what fertility treatments are since everyone asks about that too). Thankfully, they've never picked up on it and since my kids have a big variation in size, nobody seems to notice they are triplets anymore unless I volunteer the info.

BUT, I had thought about this a lot and had decided that I would try to say something back to people once my kids started to understand what was being said. I probably would have just said something, "We feel blessed to have triplets" when people would make any type of nasty comment. I'm not very good with snappy comebacks, but I always felt like I would want to emphasize in front of my kids that WE are happy and blessed to have them no matter what other people may say.

Good luck with that one. I wish people thought a little bit more before they said potentially hurtful things in front of our kids.

Kristen

I've had a person say this to me in the wal mart parking lot. I replied to her that was the most aweful thing a person had ever said to me and I would never want to kill myself. I love my life. I also said I hope she did not feel that way about her own children who were standing there with her! I was hoping she had to explain that one on the way home.

So, in answer to your question do you comment back....yes! I feel it's important for my girls to know I that love and want them.

Another answer I've given is this....

"I prayed for these children they are a gift from God!"

Audrey
SAHM
GGG"s 5-9-2003 (34weeks)

I've gotten that comment--once from a TWIN mom--IN FRONT OF HER 10 YR OLD TWINS!! I almost fell over! Mine were tiny at the time, so it meant nothing to them. But our nanny was with us and it was the first awful comment she ever heard about them (at age 19) and she was really upset!

Anyway, my standard comeback to the awful one like that is "Well, I guess it's lucky that it's NOT you, or your kids would be orphans. We're happy we have them, not suicidal."

I've also gotten "What a curse," to which I say, actually, I think it's a blessing.

Usually I just make sure I say something about being happy to have my girls.

It is still shocking to me how rude people can be!

Alice

GGG born 9/3/05 at 35w3d

>I've gotten that comment--once from a TWIN mom--IN FRONT OF
>HER 10 YR OLD TWINS!! I almost fell over!

I had that happen to me in Walmart once with twin boys who were like 6ish and behaving absolutely perfectly. I tried to blow it off, but I was MAD. I ended up hunting her down a while later and asking if I could speak with her privately (a few yards away from her kids), and told her that her kids were listening and how did she think it made them feel to know that their mom didn't want them and so on. She replied that she didn't really mean it, but agreed that her kids probably didn't understand that and so on. My husband was mortified, but oh well. Somebody needed to tell her!

BGG born 4/25/05 at 31w1d




New baby girl born 9/19/06

"What a terrible thing to say about my family! I love my kids so much, and wouldn't have it any other way!"

Meredith replies for me sometimes as she has heard this exact same answer approximately 40 million times. She says "what a terrible thing to say about us! Momma loves us SOOOOOOOOOO much, and she wouldn't have it any other way!"

What's funny is that she knows that I fake being shocked and offended because I hear it so often that it really just isn't shocking anymore, but the phrase only works with that tone. I go from happy to shocked & offended, and right back to happy with the kids the second the other person walks away.

So she imitates me faking shocked and offended when she says it. You know - little kid fake drama? It really is funny to see - I've got to get it on video some day.

BGG born 4/25/05 at 31w1d




New baby girl born 9/19/06

I swear you only still get these comments because they are identical. As soon as we ditched the stroller, I stopped getting those.

You could always try, "Don't let ME stop you.", but it sucks that your DD is already picking up on what they are saying. My comments stopped before they got old enough to understand.

Hey. I thought "triplet" was a synonym for "monster". Was that wrong?

Michele
Sarah, Gregory, Amanda
born 1/22/04 at 35w1d

Our surprise baby Austin born 06/15/2005

www.fourtimesthefun.blogspot.com

I love the "Don't let ME stop you" comment... I'm definitely gonna use that one next time!

Now watch. I'm all prepared with a smarta$$ answer and no one will say it. I'll be going around, "Don't triplets make you feel suicidal? Don't they? Huh?!? Well DON'T LET ME STOP YOU!!!" mwahahahaha!!!

Loren
GGG Jan.2005 @ 28wks

Sweetened Taters - http://sweetenedtaters.blogspot.com

LMAO!!

Here let me help you:

Me: Are THOSE triples?
You: Why yes they are!
Me: Oh. My. Gawd. Ah am sooooo serrry. I would KILL myself!
You:

Michelle

Tyler 17 1/2 years!!
Steph 15 1/2 years!!
Ayden, Ryley & Dylan 3 1/2 years!!
http://triplethefunplus2.blogspot.com/

I forgot my line!

Loren
GGG Jan.2005 @ 28wks

Sweetened Taters - http://sweetenedtaters.blogspot.com

>I swear you only still get these comments because they are
>identical. As soon as we ditched the stroller, I stopped
>getting those.

>My comments stopped before they got old enough to understand.


ARE YOU KIDDING? I swear I get those comments just as much now as I ever did. But now that we are back in the Carolinas (Bible belt), the comments are different. A lot more are positive about how lucky or blessed we are, and a lot less of the suicide and other negative comments. So it isn't nearly as annoying as it was when we lived in Memphis.

Other than the zoo, we haven't taken the stroller out more than once or twice in the last year, so that's not the problem here. My big girls are identical and James is their fraternal. Elise looks very very similar to the big girls (coloring, bone structure, facial features). And Elise is average size and the triplets are tiny, so she looks to be the same age as them. So people assume quads. Or they ask if the girls are triplets and if James is older or younger than the girls.

BGG born 4/25/05 at 31w1d




New baby girl born 9/19/06

I stopped getting comments all together when I stopped dressing them alike. I can gauge exactly how many comments I will get based on what the kids are wearing. Since they dress themselves, the girls will sometimes want to match, and the boys sometimes match on accident too. If they are matching at all, then it's just like I had the stroller again. If they are all dressed separately, no one says a word. They don't know WHAT I am. A lot of times they think I have one or two kids, and then maybe a friend's kid or something. The only comment I get is, "You have your hands full TODAY.", as if I'm going to drop off some of them and go about my merry way with one or two.

Michele
Sarah, Gregory, Amanda
born 1/22/04 at 35w1d

Our surprise baby Austin born 06/15/2005

www.fourtimesthefun.blogspot.com

Aah - that's the issue. I still dress them the same. It just seems so much easier on me and they don't care. Maybe I need to rethink that.

BGG born 4/25/05 at 31w1d




New baby girl born 9/19/06

While I've gotten lots of comments I've only gotten this one once and when the kdis were way to young to understand. I can't even imagine them hearing it now I think I would probably have to help the offending person off themself!

Sorry your girls have heard and understood this that is really awful!!!

Misty
Abigail 2 lbs 14 oz
Katie 3 lbs 1 oz
James 3 lbs 6 oz
born 11/10/05
30w 5d

My attempt at a blog http://tripletblessed.blogspot.com/

Oh boy, seriously what is wrong with people??

I have heard this a few times myself, usually I respond with a cordial "oh no, I love having triplets" or whatever.

Once before I knew what happened I responded with a: "I bet you would".

One time I was out with my sister and an older lady pointed out my babies to her daughter who was about my age or older (she had her own baby with her). So the grandmother said "Julie, look she has triplets" and "Julie" made a horrid face like -Yuck I snapped back to her so fast "Don't make that face, I love my children, so do not make that face about my babies!"

Okay, so I am not the best at snappy comebacks but even though it raises my blood pressure to get confrontational sometimes it just feels good to do it!

AZTripmom
Born at 34 weeks 4/6/07
Lily 4 pounds
Faye 3.5 pounds
Jack 5 pounds

Visit us at: www.aztrips.blogspot.com