This past weekend I found the scrapbooks that I'm going to use to do my baby books for the babies. I bought one for Carina, too, and will do a separate pregnancy book, as well.

It's kind of funny, but since the anniversary (January 8), things have been getting easier. I'm finding that I can talk about the loss without it tearing me up so bad, and that putting together a memory book for Carina makes my heart happy. It's a way of acknowledging her and celebrating her very brief existence in a way that will show Caidan and Caeleigh how much she was loved and how very real she was.

It's also a way of showing how she went ahead of them to be with God, and celebrating her great adventure with God so that they can know that she is loved and happy and will be there awaiting them when they go to be with God, hopefully as very elderly people.

For those who have recently become a part of this group, please know that it does get easier. It does get better. The love of your child does not decrease, but your acceptance of not being able to hold them and watch them grow becomes less painful and more a reality.

I'm so grateful for all of you and the love and kindness that you've shown to me this past year. It means the world to me.

Love,
Cat w/3 Kittens
Caidan, Carina and Caeleigh
born at 31 weeks, 1/8/04.

It is better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all. In memory of Carina, who was greatly loved.

Cat w/3 Kittens
Caidan, Carina and Caeleigh
Born at 31 weeks, 1/8/04.

Cat --
Ditto -- I've been feeling the same way since passing our anniversary -- not a loss of love, but the diminishing of the pain. I'm glad time does help heal, and I'm glad that you're experiencing some of that, too.

^West Rogers^, ^Keaton Edward^, ^Rebecca Joy^ 1/6/04



Missing their sister ^Maria Jose^ 4/7/04-5/10/04

Cat, I am also going to do a scrapbook for Eric. Levi and Vivian's will be a full size, while Eric's will be the smaller (I think 8"x8")
one since we have less pictures, and had as shorter time with him. I did find Levi and nVivian's books this week, though, and the front cover has a spot for three pictures, they will each have a picture of all three of them on it.


I agree that it gets easier as time goes, but I also feel like there are still "big Waves" of grief and anger that I am dealing with. But for the most part, I agree, it gets easier, I find it is easier the more people I let in on the world of losing a multiple, so they may understand us a bit better, and also the more people I reach out to to help.

I hope you're having a good week.

((HUGS))
Erika

Mom to:
Matt (1991) Megan (1994) and ^Eric Jr^ Levi and Vivian (2003) at 26 weeks

Thank you so much for sharing your encouraging words. As I have been struggling to put together my girls' birth announcements, I have been so overwhelmed by the fact that I am sending out an announcement withonly two babies in the picture, but three names. Oh, how I miss my little angel. I keep wondering if it will ever get easier, and I'm glad to hear you say it does.

Anne

Oh, Anne. Reading your message has left me sobbing because I completely understand your raw grief. You see, it can still hit me, but it is happening so much less frequently now.

I deliberately posted that message in the hopes that it would encourage others who were going through such a loss. It caught me off-guard that someone who had lost a precious little girl named Kerina (Carina) was comforted by this.

God bless you, honey. It does get easier to bear.

Cat w/3 Kittens
Caidan, Carina and Caeleigh
born at 31 weeks, 1/8/04.

It is better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all. In memory of Carina, who was greatly loved.

Caeleigh and Caidan are on the move!! My triplets are
http://lilypie.com>

Cat w/3 Kittens
Caidan, Carina and Caeleigh
Born at 31 weeks, 1/8/04.