Hi guys.

I am a father of four (5 year old boy and 3 year old triplets BBG)living in New Zealand. My wife used this site when she was pregnant and got a lot of helpful information. I thought it might be useful as it is really hard to find people to talk to who are in the same position as us. As an example there are only 15 sets of triplets born in the whole country over the course of a year. Having an older child is another factor and makes life that little bit more challenging.

Anyway we have survived so far but would love any feedback on the issues we are currently facing. Toilet training is something we want to start but find the thought of spending all day on the toilet a little daunting. I believe kids will tell you when they are ready and other people reckon it's not worth pushing them too early. Would love to hear other experiences.

Our main issue is our older boy. When we just have the triplets it all seems manageable but when you add in the fourth the whole dynamics change and it all becomes a lot more stressful. It takes one person to keep him amused and to ensure that he doesn't lead the others astray all the time. Anyone else in a similiar position and would love to hear other strategies?

Well that's it from down under for now and am happy to talk to anyone about New Zealand and what it's like with triplets in a different part of the world.

Regards

NZDad

Hello!

I've spent some time in NZ. A year at uni at Lincoln College in 1975, a 3-month trip in 1981, and a 5.5-month push bike trip in 1986. I'll get back there one of these days. I married an Aussie, so we might find an excuse to head in that general direction some day.

Toilet training -- we did not push it all -- just suggestions and Dad teaching by example...especially when we'd take hikes in the bush (no floor to mop up!)

We had one boy who was taking his time. I think he liked the extra attention. He finally trained himself over a summer -- he knew that he could not move up in preschool with his brothers if he had to still where diapers. I have forgotten many of the details -- that just shows either 1) a triplet-induced short-term memory loss or 2) life is too full of new and important happenings and life is too busy to bother to remember relatively unimportant things. (probably a bit of both!)

But as they say...we can guarentee that one's kids will be out of diapers by the time they leave for the universities.

We only have the three boys. But if I can offer any reassurances, it would be that time does move quickly, any "stage" the kids are in will pass quickly, and that things will get a little easier once they are going to school.

Vaughn and the ABC Boys
Alex, Bryce, & Calder
3-31-97 @ 28.5 weeks

Hi Vaughn

Thanks for your reply. I definitely recommend you come back for a visit some time. As yet we are not game enough to spend any length of time on an aeroplane.

We have had some success with the toilet training and realise it will be a long process. Plenty of patience required.

I see your three are nearly nine and sometimes wish we could fast forward to that stage. I'm sure that you have plenty of challenges of your own. I think we will feel more refreshed once they are all at school. Time to think and listen to the silence.

Thanks again

NZDad.

PS Our three were also born just over 28 weeks. They are actually three this April

Dw has made four trips back home to Australia -- taking just one boy each time. It is a very long flight!

These last couple years have been a lot of fun. We are an active gang and we live in an area not too different than the west coast of the South Island (perhaps Westport and the area south of there). It is fun to be able to go the the beach or the bush and not have to keep a real close eye on the boys anymore. We went on our first tramping trip two summers ago and have a trip planned this summer. We'll start stretching out the distances walks, etc. this summer.

I worked for ten years as a mule packer -- maintaining the walking tracks in a wilderness area. I hope to be able to take the boys out to that wilderness in a few years and do some volunteer work on the tracks...spend a month clearing tracks. I am 52, so I can't wait too long! Perhaps when the Boys are 11 or 12.

Enjoy all of it! They grow so fast!

Vaughn and the ABC Boys
Alex, Bryce, & Calder
3-31-97 @ 28.5 weeks

Sounds like you live in a beautiful part of the country. We also like to get out as much as possible and hope to buy a big tent in the next year for a bit of camping. The kids are too young for tramping but we are both keen to show them around the country as they grow older. At the moment they tend to run off in four different directions.

Thanks for your replies as it is great to hear that life does settle down.

NZDad

I'm not a dad, but saw your post and thought I'd chime in. I highly recommend that you search the archives about potty training. The topic comes up fairly often, and people are likely to give their great advice in detail once or twice.

That being said, my little boy told us he was ready just after his third birthday and was trained for both day and night in less than two weeks. One of my daughters was several months ahead of him and the other was several months behind (also an attention seeker). Just know that many children are really ready around 3 years old and waiting for them makes the job much easier.

Good Luck -- and search those archives, you won't be sorry.

Jeanne
Mommy to Frank, Grace & Sarah 1/18/02

Thanks for that. We did a search and got a lot of help. Our kids are off to kindy (preschool) soon and my DW really wanted them to be toilet trained. All the posts confirmed that we should wait till their ready.

Regards