Ahh Damn girlie! I know what you mean!!!! I was that mom that could do mostly what I wanted gym, playdates, park, classes... I thought the ppl that trapped themselves in the house were nuts BUT now I hate taking my kids in my own yard! In regards to food I USED to be the mom who fed her kids organic and EVERYTHING was fresh( NO BOXED FOOD) they ate veggies.....now we eat Mac n chz and cereal. It is what it is!

Jack is a bully and will push and hit so I try not to spank them because I feel it reinforces his bad behavior, we do ALOT of TO, seriously all I have to do at this point is point to the corner and off they go.

I know it will get better and wont up serial killers but they are driving me up the wall. More so than ever I need time away, I have been working and that has been a huge bonus, I miss my kiddos and feel drawn to them more so than ever! DH and I figured out a discipline plan that we both felt comfortable with and now we are on the same page with everything, things got a bit crazy last month, I was gone so much and DH had no idea what he was supposed to punish and what was allowed, it has made life much easier!

BTW, I curse like a drunken harlet, always have, its a terrible thing and super WT! I am working on it. It will get better for us all, I have faith!

BBG 6/21/06

I just want you to know i feel your pain!! Mine are going to be 4 in march and somewhere along the way i feel that who is in control seemed to switch. Theres some times when i CANNOT control them.. i mean can not.They feed off each other and think its funny. And they just egg each other on..
I have 1 out of the 3 that eats well always has.. the other 2 UGH! Sometimes i cant get a peice of food in them until afternoon.

Ive finally managed to rid Deegan of his Soother (AMEN) so thats one thing. We have STILL been fighting with the potty training thing. Its going fairly well at home with only some accidents but i dont dare go out in public without pullups on.. and from what i understand i have to get ready to enroll them in school like soon! WHAT! They cant go 12 hours without a pullup and you want them in school?!?!

Im so tired of the fighting and pushing and scratching.. oh and the tantrums..im so tired of me yelling all the time! and i just realised that i am rambling on about everything and nothing all at the same time so im going to stoip now lol

Just letting you know you arent alone =)



Nikki
mommy to
Deegan 2lbs 10oz
Seth 2lbs 2oz
Xander 2lbs 6oz
My little miracles born on Easter Sunday, March 27th, 2005 at 29 weeks 2 days

[

It has to be the age. Many days I feel like I am going to have a nervous breakdown. The not listening, fighting and stealing really gets on my nerves.

The not eating is really annoying. There are days when they won't eat a thing at a meal. They look at what I served and either eat nothing or 2 bites and ask for "something new." I want to ban that phrase from my house. Then they whine and cry when I don't magically produce another food. I don't even want to think about how little fruits and veggies they eat these days. I serve them but eating is hit or miss. Heck, eating everything is hit or miss. Something that is their favorite food one day they won't eat the next time I serve it.

The not sleeping when they are supposed to is what is really driving me over the edge. When I put them in bed they need to GO TO SLEEP because I need a break really bad. They party in their room, end up crying and have to get up again. CIO does not work anymore for the most part.

Whoever named the terrible 2's sure knew what they were talking about. I keep hearing that 3 is just as bad or worse but I plan on living in denial for the next 6 months.

Lori

http://yesidohavemyhandsfull.blogspot.com/

Mind you that this is the blind leading the blind, and I have very little idea what I'm talking about, but maybe they are bored?

I just went through a stage like that. We happened to start doing a whole bunch of new stuff lately - sledding, board games, movies in their room, one-on-one time - and they snapped out of it! They are SOOOOO much more tolerable.

Good luck, Shannon!

Loren
GGG Jan.2005 @ 28wks

Sweetened Taters - http://sweetenedtaters.blogspot.com

I agree with Loren on them being bored. Mine always got in more trouble when they were bored. My plan for survival at that age was going somewhere every morning. I think we've hit every park in this city. I also enrolled them in classes then and I started homeschooling with the Learning Box, so we'd have a structured activity in the day.

Also, with toy stealing, I just put the toy in time-out. There was no discussion about who started it and who was the "victim", if you faught it was GONE. That was the end of it.

If I could change one thing from back then, I would have separated them every chance I got. They fight because they are sick of each other. That's the bottom line.

Forget about the eating. You have to try and let that one go. Just make the food, put it on the plate and then try your hardest to just let it go. They WILL eat if they are hungry. If not, then they'll eat the next time. I know it's frustrating to cook and not have anyone eat it, so I just started making stuff "I" wanted and if they ate, well that was a bonus.

It really does get better. You've got 1.5 years though. You can make it!

Michele
Sarah, Gregory, Amanda
born 1/22/04 at 35w1d

Our surprise baby Austin born 06/15/2005

www.fourtimesthefun.blogspot.com

I feel your pain. It has been difficult over here as well. I have noticed the kids act how I act though. If I am stressed, they are brats. If I am happy relaxed mom, they listen better and have better problem solving skills (sharing and nice to each other).

Over here things got knocked put of the norm with Wyatt getting his tonsils out. The other two got a bit big in their britches from having a bit more freedom and so I have been dealing with that lately. I had to get my L&L book back and reread most of it and I feel like just in the past couple days, my kids are doing MUCH better with the consistency that book reminds me to use.

When mine started saying "NO", we would correct them by saying, "no, thank you". They still said no thank you ALOT, but the thank you takes the sting out of it. It lost it's power and appeal for them since we weren't reacting to the nos, we were correcting for the thank you. Does that make sense?

It is freaking hard. I know we all had the answers before kids came along and now that we had THREE, we don't get the opportunity to try all the great solutions we had and are stuck not knowing which way is up sometimes. And that makes us feel bad and guilty. We all have those days, don't be hard on yourself.

I hope it gets better for you soon.

Laura & Don
BBB 5/05
www.ourbighappy.blogspot.com

"

Thanks, loves! It's 7:38 am & I am dreading the day but am putting on my happy face & hoping to feel good & make them feel good.

I definitely think they get bored here. I live in a small town with absolutely nothing to do. We do have a pretty decent park, but it is 18 degrees outside with snow. We have a nice library. I may see if my mom would help me out & go with me to it. Then the whole time I am worried about tantrums & meltdowns. Oh well...gotta suck it up.

Thanks for the encouragement & advice. I appreciate it.

Check us out at:
http://thewrighttrips.blogspot.com/

Isabel, Jasper & Jonah were born on July 1, 2006

And my twin angels in heaven ~
Olivia Layne - 2/13/05
Elijah Cain - 2/13/05

Yes we all do go through this from time to time, but trust me you are going to wake up one day and they are going to be four and you are going to wonder where the time went, how they and you got from 2 to four, this is a hard time, try not to internalize everything and know that they are just starting to realize they can do things, they are going to test you, but you are going to survive it. Believe it or not I miss the 2 year old age. I have no idea where it went or what I was doing but I seem to have missed it. I got so caught up in the tantrums, screaming etc that I forgot to look around and appreciate their age. I regret it.

BBG Triplets Born March 31, 2004
31 weeks three days
Douglas
Kalie and
John Michael

It's the whining and crying that drive me crazy. They are so emotional!! In the last month I've started getting gray hair from all the stress. UGH!

I agree about the bounce house. I could not survive without it. We have it in the basement and they love it.

I cannot even imagine that 3 years old is even worse. I'll never survive!!

Karen
Mom to BGG 10-10-06
www.tiptotip.etsy.com
"Specializing in custom stroller seat covers and sun canopies"

Mamalove~

First of all, I don't think I've craved a drink more or used the Eff Word more until I had triplets.

No. I'm kidding! (Kinda) But, really. The days can be challenging and you know when they're extra challenging?

When the kids are bored.

There are days when my girls play like angels and I can go about my day knocking out some laundry and other chores.

And then there are those days when I'm constantly breaking up a fight, redirecting or making mac n cheese.

One thing that's helped: pre-school. And not for just the break it affords me, but rather they're ready for school; learning, being with other kids and other adults and enjoying other experiences.

And the other thing that's helped is if I take some time to sit on the floor and play with them, whether it's coloring, doing a puzzle, playing with their dollhouse or playing a v-tech game, this makes them happy and then I can slowly back away and leave them alone while I go back to my projects.

Lastly, it's not earth shattering advice, but the more positive I am, the nicer and more positive they are. If they see me going bonkers about something, they feed off of that and then I suddenly have 3 mini-mes going nuts.

Not sure I gave any great ideas, but wanted to let you know, you're not alone.

Lisa

Thanks for the great ideas! We do have a YMCA. I need to check & see how much memberships are.

We have a headstart program in my town. My sister's good friend is one of the teachers & she wants to sign my kids up to see if they can maybe qualify. If so, they would start in September & would go from 8 - Noon everyday. You drop them off & they feed them breakfast, brush their teeth & feed them lunch. How awesome would that be!!? Plus, I think they have a speech therapist that works with them. Oh, I'm prayin we get selected.

Check us out at:
http://thewrighttrips.blogspot.com/

Isabel, Jasper & Jonah were born on July 1, 2006

And my twin angels in heaven ~
Olivia Layne - 2/13/05
Elijah Cain - 2/13/05

I am going to school for education. I will graduate with degrees in early childhood and elementary education and I still feel crazy sometimes. One day I asked my dh what in the hell I was doing thinking I wanted to deal with a classroom of them? Anyway, my fave class has been classroom management. It has really helped me control my own home with much less frustration. It's based on dealing with children on their cognitive and developmental level. A few key points:

1. Of course model the behavior that you want them to exhibit.
2. Allow them to say no. They are in a power struggle with that. As long as it is not something that is going to physically hurt them or their sibling, allow them to say no to food, etc.
3. Allow them to make decisions by giving them choices.
4. Time out should not be a "punishment" it should be a comfortable place to cool off.
5. We should not use praise/rewards or physical punishment to teach them. It is more of a long term cognitive plan where they work together to form a plan and help you implement it.


I know some of this sounds like mumbo jumbo and I honestly thought
"yeah right, they need their butts whipped" but it has worked so much better. It was exhausting at first, but it has worked wonders for us. there are still days where I'm tossing the "f" word around like a sailor, but they are much less than they used to be.

I have more tips and direct examples if you care to hear any more, if not, toss my advice and don't mind me. I hope that you can find them some things to get them busy. Another thing that really helped us is activity time. We do scissor time, color time, playdough time, etc. They love it and I can relax a bit.

I hope you can avoid the breakdown, I have been known to have jello shots in my fridge and toss some back before I totally melt down. I have a great recipe for some malibu and pineapple ones if that's the only advice you want from me!

Becca

Check us out at...thepingels.com

I know how you feel. I thought I was the only one feeling this way. I lie awake at night sometimes thinking, "I'm doing this all wrong." Of course, it doesn't help that my mother thinks I'm not hard enough on my kids. She thinks I should spank them for every little thing. Old school, I guess. I do discipline my kids (TO, sit in room), but sometimes it just seems that the discipline just isn't working. I've read 3 different books on raising kids, but nothing I've tried seems to change their behavior?? My DS is definintely much harder to deal with than my DDs. He is what they call "the strong-willed child." I will say that since they turned 3 in Sept., they have gotten better. Plus they are in preschool now and that has helped too. But, I still sometimes feel like they are "winning the war" KWIM? Sometimes my husbands will say, "the patients have taken over the asylum." I have to admit that sometimes I have to wonder, am I making any progress here???

Joan
mom to Caroline, Erin and Robbie
born 9/26/05 @ 35 weeks
visit us at http://www.babyhomepages.net/greenetriplets

No advice for ya, girl! I'm right there in the same spot. Thanks for posting this because I need to read the replies also.


Luke- 4lb,12oz
Wade - 3lb,4oz
Zoe - 5lb,2oz
Born at 34 weeks

http://3giggles.blogspot.com

I don't have much new to add. Most PP are exactly where I am and how I try to handle it. I will tell you I lost it with DD the other day and yelled up to her "Shut up" and she said back "No Mommy. I will NOT shut up." She told me huh?

Michelle
Sam, Charlotte and Jacob
June 14, 2006
29w6d (no the hospital wouldn't give me the extra day!)

Okay, I'm finally done with gymnastics, homework, lysoling the whole house. So I found some things that might help.

1.Young Kids are egocentric. They fundamentally can not see others point of view until around age 6 or 7 they can start using perspective a bit more. until then you have to remember that they can't think about how their actions affect anyone else. Their intellectual development is just not to that level.

here are some specific examples:

While children feel that adults rules are sacred, but just can't follow them sometimes. They do not understand that they have broke rules, no matter how many times you tell them. They aren't likely to be capable of understanding exactly why some behaviors are acceptable and others are unacceptable. They best thing in the case of rules is to keep reminding (AGAIN AND AGAIN) one day it will "click"

SHARING THE BIG ONE... This goes back to egocentrism. Once you realize your kids can't think of others feelings, it really helps. They just don't realize other people have feelings. it sounds crazy, but it's true. Say one of your kids takes a toy away, they other whacks them with something else. You should comfort BOTH children. Our first instinct is to yell at the offender who has NO clue why they are being yelled at. They think, I wanted the toy, I took the toy. Period. You should step in and say to the child who has had the toy taken and retaliated with hitting "I don't think child A knows why you are upset, can you tell her why?" They will most likely be too upset to answer, so keep rephrasing the question (YES I KNOW LOTS OF TIME AND PATIENCE) saying Child A upset you by taking the car and that is fine you have a right to be upset, Validate thier feelings. When child B finally calms down and tells child A why they are upset, you should then ask Child a Why they took the toy. Point out that it upset their sibling, and point out we don't hit. By the time you do all of this they will be playing happily again, but you are laying the ground work for the mto be compassionate in the future.

* The goal here is voluntary unselfishness. The book points out that many adults force children to share when few of us would be as generous with our prized possesions. That new toy to them is like a new car to us and we wouldn't just let someone take our new car because they don't have one. Children's right of ownership and right to decide whether or not to share must first be respected in order to prepare them for voluntary share. Only when sharing is a real choice and not coerced can a child make the choice to be generous.

Children also are great at lying... They sometimes think that something is true because you want it to be and something is yours because you want it. These beliefs cause children to tell "lies" and take things guiltlessly that don't belong to them. You need to respond with empathy. Something along the lines of "you really wish that was yours or you really wish you had done that. This helps them seperate wishes from reality without making your child feel bad about themselves. Children as old as 6, have a hard time telling the difference between an honest mistake and a purposeful lie. They also tend to judge how bad it is to tell a lie in relation to how likely it was to be found out and therefore punished. They think a believable lie is acceptable and an one that stretches the truth too far is bad.

another thing is to make their environment pleasing and enjoyable. Make things accesable, but not overwhelming. Picking up is much easier if things aren't all lumped into 2 or 3 toyboxes. Sort things into different containers and then store them in the toyboxes or on shelves. Show them how to pick up and keep working with them. They will feel a huge sense of accomplishment for doing it eventually.

I have more, but I'm getting tired and this post is 20 miles long already. Let me know if you want more or if you have any questions.
***KEEP IN MIND YOU WILL NOT SEE IMMEDIATE RESULTS YOU WILL HAVE TO DRAW FROM PATIENCE THAT HAS PRETTY WELL BEEN TAPPED OUT but you are teaching them to make the choices on their own, by teaching them how others feel. And not because of some mysterious adult rule because mom said so. Reason with them and they will learn to use reason.

Hope this helps...Becca

Check us out at...thepingels.com

Malibu and Pineapple Jello Shots.

I like mine pineappley...

I pour 3/4 a cup Malibu and 1/4 cup Pineapple juice in a container and place in freezer until really cold.

Meanwhile Pour 1/2 cup pineapple juice and 1/2 cup water in pan and bring to a boil. Add small package of Pineapple jello stir until dissolved.

Add cold Malibu/juice mixture, stir. Put in shot containers and refrigerate for 3 hours. They are yummy, just make sure the kids don't get a hold of them.



Becca

Check us out at...thepingels.com

I just wanted to say THANK YOU so much for posting this thread. I feel like I am right there with you. My kids are wearing me out at 28 almost 29months! LOL! I am exhausted! In spite of what everyone says I am just hoping age 3 will be better or not any worse. Hang in there.

Debbie
33wks
1/25/08