In the last few months my kids have started showing behavior like spoiled brats. We started school shopping the other night and they wanted EVERYTHING and when we wouldn't let them wear what we bought immediately you'd have thought I just killed their dog the way they cried and screamed.

I try hard to be consistent and firm, saying No when it's appropriate and we have a reward chart for them to "earn" things with good behavior. They lose spots on the chart when they behave badly. One went through a "Gimme" phase and I wouldn't give him what he wanted until he rephrased and said "May I please."

Lately it seems they all have such an attitude of entitlement and ask for everything and I'm just wondering how to keep from this being a phase to turning into having spoiled brats for kids.

Michelle
Sam, Charlotte and Jacob
June 14, 2006
29w6d (no the hospital wouldn't give me the extra day!)

My kids started doing that and no matter what I do...it hasn't stopped. It seems to be a phase, because it is getting better but it's been going on since they started kindergarten (they are getting ready to go into 1st grade).

I hung their school clothes in their closets last night, told them not to wear them until school...they are not for playing outside, blah, blah. Well, 3 of them came downstairs dressed in new clothes, and then told me they don't know what is old. One of my girl threw a massive fit over it. Screaming, "I don't know where my old clothes are".

Anyway, I don't really have any advice, I just wanted to let you know you are not alone. Oh and BTW, when they have fits in the store or start the, "I want" thing, we leave. They get NOTHING, and then I go back and shop alone, they get no say in it. For my girls, that is torture because they have their own styles and it is different than mine! LOL

Dawn

Mom to Samantha, Jeremy, Paige and Christian

Born 12/12/03 @ 31w 2d



http://lovinglifewithquads.blogspot.com

I'm a push over AND I want them to be happy and love me every minute. And that is NOT a good thing.

I find that when I'm more of a serious Mom, a Mom who gives limited choices and totally means business; I get some good behaviors.

It's when I'm silly or always buying them a little toy that they get into this mode of expecting and entitlement.

I have to remind myself that I AM THE MOM! Who really cares if they're mad at me for a little bit? They're going to do what I say!

There was a time last year, when every time I picked them up from school, they all asked: What did you buy me?

OMG! Nothing! I bought you milk and cereal! That's what I bought you!

So, I am careful to reward them when warranted; not on a whim. I've really curtailed that habit because it truly was making them brats. Here I was, thinking I was such a great Mom, but it was backfiring on me.

We've got a star chart going and it's really working for us. I hope it continues.

And I try really hard to maintain this fun, silly Mom persona and balance it with the serious Mom. I'm not going to be intimidated by three 6 year olds!

In my house it seems like it all comes down to who has the strongest will wins.

They NEVER have thrown a temper since they were about 2.

Lovie, I am sorry you are having a hard time, but if you are going to scream and carry on like that, you need to go to your room. You may not scream like that here. You can come down when you can behave yourself.

You can't find your old clothes to go play in? That's too bad, I am sure the neighbors won't mind if you go in your underwear. What's that? Well, either play in your underwear or get in your old clothes. If they don't decide or change right away, then -I think it is time for you to go to bed. Night night.

Your kids will get away with whatever you allow them to. You are the boss. Do not tolerate them being brats, and then they have no opportunity to act like ones.

Easier said than done, I know. We do some Love and Logic, some spanking on the tush when that doesn't work.
Good luck!

Laura & Don
BBB 5/05
www.ourbighappy.blogspot.com

"

Normal behaviour where they're pushing boundaries! Stay firm and consistent in your discipline/rewards and you'll be fine. Kids ARE self centred and can't always understand exactly WHY they can't have anything, even when it's explained to them.

I now have 11 year olds who know how much things cost and how to save for the things they really want. I also have a nearly 18 year old who finds his own money for the college holidays by working when he can.

UK mum to Aaron 18, and Jasper, Eleanor & Nathaniel 11 born 17/3/99 33wks2days

Great advise, thanks

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