I am a 38 year old mother to 23 month old GGB triplets, and for some reason I have spent the last 6 months in a total depression. It's gotten worse over the months, and now it's like I can't get through one day without crying all the time. I've been seeing a counselor since May, and I've been taking Prozac for 3 weeks now. The depression feels very similar to the hormone-shift I had right after I had the triplets, so I've also started taking birth control pills (to regulate my hormones). I have a nanny who comes 5 hours a day M-F, so I feel like I have adequate help, but I still feel majorly burned out. Does anyone have any advice or suggestions or even similar situations (if only to commiserate?). All I do is cry, and I just want to be myself again. Any feedback would be greatly appreciated.

Kathryn
Mother to Lauren, Alexandra & William - 12/22/2008

I just got online to post about a related issue. I think there are stages of transitioning to triplet parenthood and I'd love to hear from others with older kids about it. Mine are a few months older than yours and I'm a few months younger than you, but also feeling a sort of burn out. for me, now, it's a career/identity crisis, trying to find the right balance and match for work and $.

is prozac supposed to kick in sooner than 3 weeks? if so, maybe you should talk to your dr and switch doses or meds. When I started lexapro I felt better in days. not on it at the moment. today I got that "I want to cry" feeling, so though I'm not as deep in it at the moment, I feel like I could be going in that direction.

I think its great that you started prozac. again, when I went on meds they helped a lot pretty quickly, so its worth consulting your dr. for an adjustment. and then maybe talk therapy might help too.

Kathryn~

Not sure I have anything earth shattering to offer except to say it sounds like you're doing everything you can to regulate your feelings with medication and by seeing a counselor.

Raising children, especially multiples is a major challenge. We don't need anyone to tell us this, right?

One of the things my wonderful OB doc told me, which was basically common sense advice and I'll pass it on to you, is to take your vitamins. Especially, B6.

Try and carve out time for yourself, too. For exercise. If only to take a 30 minute walk in your neighborhood, this can definitely help to clear your head, KWIM?

Hope you start feeling better.

Lisa

Dear Eema and Lisa,

Thank you both for your responses... it makes all the difference in the world knowing that I'm not alone out there. I know I need to give the medications more time to regulate my system, but I just want to feel better as soon as possible, ya know? My doctor has been unbelievably patient and kind with me and my "condition" - I have a follow-up appointment with her after the Thanksgiving holiday. I must admit, I have neglected taking my vitamins lately, and it's usually something I'm so good about. I will take your advice and start taking them again every day. I work part time from home, so I have very little free time to myself... I'm sure that is a major contributor to my depression.

Eema, I totally agree with you about the difficulty of transitioning into the different stages with multiples. I would love to hear from mothers who have made it through this difficult time. I'll keep checking the boards to see if/when there are some responses out there.

Thanks again for taking the time to respond... it really helped improve my mood.

Hugs,
Kathryn

Kathryn -

It's been a while since I was going through that stage, but it was when the girls hit 18 months that I finally had had enough of the sobbing on the couch during their naps.

I got hobbies. I'm not a real big fan of getting out of the house, but I spent a LOT of time at Target during those days. I finished up my Assoc of Sci online through a local college, then enrolled at a University. I started doing home improvement projects. I found that the busier I made myself, the happier I was. It was when I felt like I was in a never-ending baby rut that the days were the worst.

Remind yourself that this DOESN'T LAST FOREVER. As hard as it sounds, try to laugh off even the worst moments since the kids will be in school in a few years and it will all be behind you.

Loren
GGG Jan.2005 @ 28wks

Sweetened Taters - http://sweetenedtaters.blogspot.com

Dear Loren,

Thank you so much for your message. I'd love to start taking some cooking classes soon, but at the moment I work part-time from home, so when my nanny is here, I'm usually stuck getting caught up with my job. I keep telling myself that this phase won't last forever, and that does help... I just wish I felt better in the meantime. It's funny, I was totally fine the first 16 months I had the triplets. I was exhausted, but emotionally stable. Now all of a sudden, I'm a hormonal mess. Well, hopefully the prozac will kick in soon, and the BCP will help regulate my hormones. In the meantime, I'll work on some retail therapy at Target (my favorite store)! Thanks again for your message!

Kathryn

I saw your post and though "Wow, I'm not the only one". Lately all I want to do is stay in bed and sleep. Lots of things are going on in my life that are affecting me in a negative way. I think that is why I have gained so much weight over the last few yrs. I eat to make myself feel better but really all it does is make me feel worse, so I eat more. I'm thinking of going to a Doctor but the last time I was put on med's for PPD they made me feels worse. What kind of Doctor do you go to? My PCP closed her business and my OB is out on maternity leave. I need to do something now so it doesn’t start to affect my family.

Tanna

06/22/07 29 weeks 4 days
Lincoln 2 lbs 13 oz
Colton 2 lbs 14.4 oz
Dakota 2 lbs 11oz
http://tannastriplets.blogspot.com/

Dear Tanna,

I've been going to my PCP, who is a regular internist, and a counselor for weekly therapy sessions. If things don't improve however, I think I might seek out a psychiatrist. My depression feels very hormone-driven, and it's intermittent (some days I have it, others I don't) which is really frustating. I can definitely relate to you on many levels. Having triplet toddlers is the hardest thing I've ever done, and I've been thru some really hard times. Anyhoo, if you ever feel like chatting, venting, crying, and/or commiserating, my email address is katheresa@gmail.com. Whereabouts do you live?

I'm so sorry that you are experiencing this. No one invites depression into their lives, it creeps in like an unwelcome visitor and can often take some time to take its leave.

You mentioned that you've been on the Prozac for about 3 weeks. That's not quite long enough to know if it will be effective for you. Most antidepressants take up to 4-6 weeks to become therapeutic in your system. If you haven't noted any (even small) improvements yet, it might be worth asking for an increase in the prozac. I'm not sure what dose you're on, but there is wiggle room up to 60 mg a day. Sleep, appetite, mood, energy, libido, feelings of hopelessness, helplessness are all a part of depression. If you are not sleeping well, consider asking for something to help you sleep to augment the Prozac. I'm not sure what the USDA equivalent of Imovane is, but you could ask if you're finding sleep a problem. Vitamins - particularly the B complex, can offer some stress relief. In addition, when I suffered some postpartum anxiety, I was told to take Omega 3 supplements (not sure if anxiety is a component for you however I found that these affected my sleep so caution is advised). If you are feeling so hopeless that you are having thoughts of harming yourself or the children, please, please, please let your doctor or health care provider know. You are a good Mom. This is a scary thing to go through and you are doing the right thing for you and your children by seeking support.

This can take some time to turn around. In the meantime, you're doing the right thing by getting counselling along with some medication therapy. The combination of the two are known to be most effective as a treatment for depression. If you decide to seek psychiatric support, try to find someone who specializes in post-partum issues. If you can afford it, try to get some more help so that you can have a day off completely. If you can't do that, try to schedule in an activity every day just for you. You schedule the babies naps, feeds, playtime etc. You need the same - but activities just for you. This might be a bath, walk, tea with a friend, jog...whatever it is. Have this time for yourself EVERYDAY - ideally out of the house. If your husband/partner is not aware of what's going on, try to help him understand so that he can help you by taking some of the load off. Let him know what would be helpful to you. Be gentle with yourself. You are going to get through this.

Sending thoughts of strength and encouragement your way...

Janet
G - 12/07 35 weeks
GGG-04/10 30 weeks

Hi Kathryn

Some good advice already below. I just wanted to let you know that late onset post partum depression can be fairly common in mothers of multiples. I suffered from this myself when my children were around 20 months old. I was given antidepressants and stayed on them for 6 months (the minimum for them to work properly) and then was almost back to normal. Life can and does get better. If you could get out and do a bit of exercise, that would help enormously.

UK mum to Aaron 18, and Jasper, Eleanor & Nathaniel 11 born 17/3/99 33wks2days

been meaning to thank you for this post!

I also had late onset PPD - with a bit of late onset PP thyroid disorder (that resolved itself). My drs respecetively said that neither the thyroid issue nor the depression were post-partum but I knew better.

the triplet experience is just so different in almost every way and my doctors did not understand.

but still, I went on Lexapro for a year and it helped tremendously.

love to all!

Eema

GGG 6/14/08

Kathyrn,
Sounds like you are on the right track and doing the all right things. You are seeking help for the depression and you have help with the kids.
I would be asking how long the prozac should take to kick in. Not all drugs work well for all people. You might need to try another medication.
If it makes you feel any better I can remember crying a lot too. Some days I still cry some times. Seems like I always feel like I should be able to do it all and keep up with it all and I can't.......all as in the house, the laundry, the kids, the dog, the bills and the husband etc. Not trying to bring you down but just letting you know you aren't alone. We haven't been able to afford extra help so far. Child care is expensive.
Hang in there!

Debbie
33wks
1/25/08

You are NOT alone. A triplet pregnancy wreaks havoc with your hormones, and it takes the body a LOOOONG time to get straightened out. I have heard of PPD rearing its ugly head up to 5 years after birth, believe it or not. Triplet toddlers are not exactly easy on the emotions, and that is exacerbating it, I'm sure.

Give the Prozac another few weeks, and if that doesn't do it, go back and try something else. A lot of people (including me) have had great luck with Cymbalta, and it works FAST. Like within a week.

Do you have a plan if you have a sudden need/urge to hurt a child? Make one now. I have always been a stable, normal person, but PPD hit me hard and fast. I went from crying, to an uncontrollable urge to throw James out of the window. Thankfully, I had read here that if you ever feel that way, you should toss the kid in the crib and RUN outside! That's exactly what I did, but if I hadn't read about it previously, I don't know what I would have done. It's an awful feeling, knowing that, at least at that moment, I was truly psychotic. I honestly understand what made Andrea Yates drown all her kids in the tub.

Did I mention that I was previously a perfectly sane person with a very vanilla, mid-class, drama-free life?? Nobody would ever have expected me to be someone who had those feelings, but they cropped up FAST. Make a plan now. You probably won't ever need it, but make it anyway. What will you do with those babies in an urgent situation? Where can you put them where they will be safe (even if hungry & crying!) if you need to leave them and call for help? Who will you call? Where will you go (somewhere you can't see or hear them - for me, the back porch)?

BGG born 4/25/05 at 31w1d




New baby girl born 9/19/06

http://www.tripletconnection.org/triplet_forum/dcboard.php

BGG born 4/25/05 at 31w1d




New baby girl born 9/19/06